ragamuffin asked
JOEY: I'm sorry Pheebs, I just, y'know, I just wanted to do a good deed. Like-like you did with the babies. PHOEBE: This isn't a good deed, you just wanted to get on TV! This is totally selfish. JOEY: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What about you, having those babies for your brother? Talk about selfish! PHOEBE: What-what are you talking about?! JOEY: Well, yeah, it was a really nice thing and all, but it made you feel really good, right? PHOEBE: Yeah. So? JOEY: It made you feel good, so that makes it selfish. Look, there's no unselfish good deeds, sorry. PHOEBE: Yes there are! There are totally good deeds that are selfless. JOEY: Well, may I ask for one example? PHOEBE: Yeah, it's… Y'know there's—no you may not! JOEY: That's because all people are selfish. PHOEBE: Are you calling me selfish?! JOEY: Are you calling you people? (Chandler rolls his eyes.) Yeah, well sorry to burst that bubble, Pheebs, but selfless good deeds don't exist. Okay? PHOEBE: I'm gonna find a selfless good deed. I'm gonna beat you, you evil genius. ***LATER*** PHOEBE: I cannot believe I can't find a selfless good deed! Y'know that old guy that lives next to me? Well, I snuck over there and-and raked up all the leaves on his front stoop. But he caught me and force-fed me cider and cookies. Then I felt wonderful. That old jackass!
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