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Female, 36 years old
ny, Western US

  Offline - Last On: 702days 5 hours ago

18 Buddies
28 Subscribers
46,593 Profile Views
52,540 Posts | Member Since: 7/25/2002
Link to this profile:

i won`t have to anymore jon groff

Interests: Dogs / Dancing / Games / Theater / Singing
Homepage: (None)
Birthday:10/11/1985 (36 Years Old)
IM Type: MSN IM Name:
Occupation: Dancer
Marital Status: Married
Sexual Preference: (Decline to State)
Religion: Other
Politics: (Decline to State)
Fav. Movie: good will hunting, you`ve got mail, dead poets
Fav. TV Show: House, macgyver, poker
Fav. Book: Without You by Anthony Rapp
Fav. Song: i like broadway :-) and singer/songwriters
Fav. Food: Donuts
Fav. Car: bah. walkings where its at
Theme 'evanescence2' created by NicolesLove
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Its a "help me out while i`m doing this, then i`ll delete it` thread. unless it turns into some kind of crazy cool party - Mood:Good
Friday December 05 20081:39:07 AM |
But first, help

writing essay.

brain fried.

"However, there were some parts of life that were a ________ facing women, no matter their race, class or location"

looking for a word/phrase like 'common thread' but i can't use that cuz i used to already

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I think i sucked. - Mood:Good
Thursday December 04 200811:56:25 PM |
I think my solo sucked.

Though i wish i could record my thoughts while dancing an improv piece. They are hilarious.

"Oh my god this is probably boring, i should throw in a trick. wait, i don't know any tricks! well. do a jump or something!! i can't jump very well! and i have bad knees. just jump.... ok, you're on the floor now you can smooth that over, make it flow!.. ok get off the floor. LOOk UP! don't look at the floor.. they look bored. do another trick.. didn't we already have this discussion... holy f*ck how long is this damn song????????? do a time filler so you can think of what to do next... BREATHE."

piece i actually like tomorrow!! hopefully that will kick ass.


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Oh my god i`m so nervous - Mood:Good
Thursday December 04 20081:02:00 PM |
Dance performance tonight

Holy poo. its only 1pm and i'm already shaking nervous thats not good performance is at 7:30pm


What if i suck?
What if i forget the timing of elianahs? which is entirely possible, i don't know it that well.

What if my solo is horridly off balance? what if i'm not in the right 'zone' to make poo up off the top of my head??


i really don't wanna suck.

and i have so much other poo to do!!

i stil haven't decided on a frickin song

hold me.

There are 17 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

i`m so happy to be on a break i`m actually reading through newbie threads and not wanting to scratch my eyes out - Mood:Good
Thursday December 04 200812:20:50 AM |
i have 7 minutes left.

20 minutes are not long when put into break status.

Gimme suggestions of what to do with my 7 minutes.

er. 6 now.

There are 10 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

This is the "Nicole is losing her f*cking mind" journal. Enter at your own risk. - Mood:Good
Wednesday December 03 20085:04:17 PM |

Oh my God. Breathe. Breathing. I'm breathing. I am seriously going to go jump off the admission building.

I couldn't fall asleep last night, i was writing a paper all night til 4am, then couldn't sleep. Went to class today til 2pm,

then took a shower, had dance rehearsal til 5pm.

I have an african dance class from 6-8pm where he runs us into the ground THEN I have a different rehearsal from 8-10pm

THEN i have to stay up all fricking night and write a 6 page paper.

THEN tomorrow i have classes all f*cking day, then a performance at night

and the same thing friday as thursday.

I'm just going to slit my wrists and get it over with. save everybody some trouble.

There are 36 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Someday I will learn not to leave papers til the last minute. - Mood:Good
Wednesday December 03 20082:21:41 AM |
Okay. SO this 4-6 page paper on a book i haven't read is due tomorrow at noon.

Do I:

Write the thing all night, hand it in on time, possibly, get no sleep. problems: i have classes tomorrow. I have dance rehearsal at 3-4:30 then another intense class class from 6-8pm then i have to rehearse my solo later that night and possible have to run another girls piece i'm in after that. No sleep +doing all that =DEATH.

Other choice is to do what i can now, go to bed at like 4am, not hand it in, get marked off for it for turning it in late. problem is, then when do i write it??? i'm busy all day, and night tomorrow. I'm even busier thursday and i may have a few hours on friday afternoon but even then..

I'm an idiot. I just had a week off. I'm an idiot.

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I`m sittring on my bed in my dorm room sobbing my eyes out at 4:30am when i have a class tomorrow. Why? F*cking tv show :-P - Mood:Good
Monday December 01 20084:26:30 AM |
Seriously. I have class tomorrow! Yet here i am, 4:30am, sitting on my bed watching third watch on surfthechannel, sobbing, blowing my nose, and occasionally laughing at myself for sobbing over a tv show.

Its the one where bobby dies I like bobby. But a character dying never makes me cry. I'm too much of a non get involver. When he died i just thought "aww man. That was a good character. And that guy was a good actor in this. That sucks".
Its the OTHER characters sobbing and hysterically crying that makes me cry every damn time. PBTH.

RIP Bobby Caffey.
*blows nose*

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What to do with my last night off? - Mood:Good
Sunday November 30 200812:11:58 AM |


Don't make me go back to having responsibilitys, essays and finals Have you no heart?

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Is it so wrong to think that decorating for Christmas should includ lots of smiling, singing, dancing and being happy? - Mood:Good
Friday November 28 20087:23:40 PM |
My grandma. Doesn't just take all the fun out of Christmas decorating, she is the most miserable decorator i have ever seen. I think she wins the prize for Most Miserable Decorator in the world. She doesn't even start out happy and cheery, then go to miserable from lack of bulbs that work or non cooperating tree.

OH NO. She starts out miserable, yelling and screaming at anyone around. Namely me. And grandpa. And SWEARS. My god. For no good reason! Opens a box of lights, SCREAMS "NICOLE BRING ME ANOTHER LIGHT!!! NOW!!"
Um. Okay?

I don't get it. I won't help her, because i know i'll just get bitched at all day. Who the f*ck wants that when they are decorating a xmas tree? Helping her doesn't make her any less miserable. Just makes both of us miserable.


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Its the "Its thanksgiving night and nicole is bored and apparently YT is dead and i happen to hav random thoughts" journal. - Mood:Good
Thursday November 27 20089:30:53 PM |
So yea. since i have no one to converse with on here since no one is f*cking here i shall post random things that pop into my head that i MUST share all throughout the night.

Like, I want this bag:

30$ though. BAH.

Or this one:

10$. bah.

There are 41 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Hot chocolate/ Goods gloves/ Tic tacs/ Cherry falvored candy canes / printer paper/ gel pens/ rechargable batteries/ battery operated candles - Mood:Good
Thursday November 27 20086:51:58 PM |
^ my stocking stuffer list

My thanksgiving:

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we`re all gonna die. - Mood:Good
Thursday November 27 20082:27:25 PM |
Thanksgiving makes me nervous. I am a very food borne illness paranoid person. I'm also food safety and sanitation certified. Which did not help my paranoia.

The turkey was supposed to be done around 4.

It 2:20. and my grandma says it done.

And the stuffing IN the bird. We are all gonna die.

I should take a shower.
My head itches.

I'm gonna eat green bean casserole. And eat leftovers.

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If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it, don’t be mad once you see that he want it - Mood:Good
Thursday November 27 20081:43:02 AM |
I like that song. Good thing too. Because it is completely stuck in my head.

and i am completely in love with this guy and this video

So its 1:39, night before thanksgiving. and... i am bored. the boy who says he wants me i don't think does. since he doesn't seem to be all that interested in keeping in touch with me.

Can someone please tell him to come get me if he wants me or stop torturing me by not being here? Thanks.

I think about doing schoolwork and my head explodes. Its not pretty. I won't even let myself think about what all i have to do to list it all out right now. My brain will not let me.

Someone come over here and play cards with me.
Or dance to beyonce with me

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Does this page load for you? - Mood:Good
Wednesday November 26 200811:09:21 PM |

I can't get that picture to load. Does it work for anyone else?

you have to go here, go to 'recital', then 2005, scroll down

I really need that picture

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Have you ever come to a depressing revelation/realization - Mood:Good
Wednesday November 26 20083:37:02 PM |
It sucks. As i just realized that who and how I am , i am inevitably going to f*ck up my life. Because of who and what i'm attracted to and how I deal with things and the ways I am f*cked up.It unavoidable pretty much.

Which sucks. Amd is frightening as all hell.

Have you ever come to a realization like that?

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Holy crap. People actually bought some of the items from my cafepress shop. - Mood:Good
Wednesday November 26 20081:45:56 AM |

I have 6.01$ now

i've had that shop since '05. sept/oct two people bought things I'm all excited. People are wearing my poo.

AND one of the shirts features a buncha ipod-esque blacked out shadow pictures of be in dance poses. I'm on someones shirt



I'm missing a friend. He's about 6'3, blue eyes, lovely southern accent and will answer to 'butta'.
If you see him let me know.

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I love that `jagoff` is the insult of choice - Mood:Good
Tuesday November 25 200812:12:31 PM |
Tv show. Apparently they can't use any stronger of language. So everyone is a jagoff.


Sorry. Finals stress. And performance stress. Choreographer stress. and Dancer stress.
And holiday stress.

I need a valium. Or a back rub.

I vote for 12:30 trivia i don't think i'm gonna be around at 2.

I'm still freezing. Still don't have any mail.

Still don't know where i'm moving. I should call res life. and dining services. I wonder if my dining dollars roll over.

My avy and profile overlap beautifully. I just noticed. huh

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Wtf. MY guy friends have more body issue/image problems than my girl friends. - Mood:Good
Monday November 24 20089:34:06 PM |
Seriously. If i have to hear one more of my guy friends bitch and complain and get depressed about how 'fat' they are...

They aren't fat either. WTF. I thought having more guy friends than girl friends i'd at least avoid the whole "zomg i gained .5 pounds I'M A COW"

But no

Is that just my dipass friends? Or are guys starting to have more "zomg i am so fat" when they aren't issues?

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I`m pretty sure i`m about to overdose. Or have already . - Mood:Good
Saturday November 22 20087:59:38 PM |
On girl scout cookies. I like the samoas but people who get free girl scout cookies can't be picky. They are the caramel topped ones.

I've seriously, over the course of the day... had about 15. There has to be something medically wrong with that.

My friend is coming over tonight. I.. yea. I wish he wasn't. Hes SUCH a frickin downer. And i don't really wanna do anything tonight. Its a non social night. But he keeps bitching about how he has no friends and how hes going to kill himself so i'm like blah. fine. lets hang out.

I'm not in a people mood. Which is not a bad mood mind you. Just not a people mood


I just took an hour long shower. It was marrrrrrrrrvelous.

Bah. Now hes on his way over. BAH. I am a terrible friend.
But a person can only take so much suicide threatening.

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Well I don`t know just what i`m here for. I want more than words can describe. I`ve been deprived, can you believe it? My whole world well its falling apart well it falls til it falls apart around me. And you pick me up, you get me high. - Mood:Good
Saturday November 22 20084:40:50 PM |
I've discovered that i had having things to do. But i hate not doing anything. I want to do stuff. I just don't want to HAVE to do stuff.


Like i love that its Saturday and i don't have class, or rehearsal, or anything. But i'm bored out of my mind. Not that i'd rather be in class, oh no. But. I wish i could find something enjoyable to occupy my time.

I'm been watching Third Watch on youtube. Good show.

WHY is it like 30 degrees in my room? I am sitting here with 4 layers of pants, 3 shirts and two hoodies, and fuzzy socks and i can't feel my fingers.

I shouldn't have to wear gloves in my own damn room.

I am SO bringing my space heater. I don;'t care if its not allowed, if its a 'fire hazard'. At least if its starts a fire i'll be f*cking warm.

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Do you nthink i could find a way to cook break and bake cookies over a candle? - Mood:Good
Friday November 21 20086:38:20 PM |
Cuz i have some. And i have no oven.

Just a microwave and a toaster.

I want cookies

I would just eat them raw but my luck i'm get salmonella or whatever you get from raw cookie dough (which i should know since i am food safety and sanitation certified).

So. Ideas?

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Its my thread of snippets and random facts and observations. - Mood:Good
Friday November 21 20083:01:06 PM |
The pooty essay i wrote got an A. Holy f*ck. How did that happen?
It says "excused late" on the top too. Which i kinda feel bad about. It was due friday but i emailed the teacher friday morning with my extenuating circumstances that prevented me from writing the paper and he said get it to me when you can. I was truthful in my email but i took a smidge more time than was needed to finish that thing. But an A? Not that i'm complaining but.. that paper was seriously a piece of poo.

I wish i didn't have anything to do today.

but no. dance rehearsal for my dance from 3:30-5 then 5-6:30 for a piece i'm in, then a dance concert thats required to attend from 7:30-who knows. BAH BAH BAH.

i named my dances.

Solo: Bleeding Flaxseeds
Duo about sanity vs insanity with insanity corrupting sanity and it ending in a big crazy party. involving glow sticks: Manic Oppression.


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I wake to a clock radio. Whatever song is playing usually somehow gets in my dream. Carrie Underwoods "don`t even know his last name" made for a really odd interesting dream. - Mood:Good
Wednesday November 19 20081:54:29 PM |
Oh my GOD this chocolate and nut cookie is HEAVENLY. Holy crap. I may have an orgasm of the mouth.

Surprise, surprise, my face hurts.

I actually went to class today. Yay.

I had some WEIRD ass dreams yo.

in one, someone was writing in fluorescent glow in the dark writing and it was some kind of john nash type secret code thing i had to figure out. Then all my old roommates all moved back in with me, in my new room, and i tried to escape and i had to escape out of this mental hospital looking thing.

THEN the Carrie Underwood song came on. Yea. I'm.. not even gonna go there

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A girl i went to school with might go to jail for murder - Mood:Good
Tuesday November 18 20087:33:29 PM |
I hope she does. Not that i'm bitter or anything but she made everyone she possibly coulds life hell in middle/high school. I hope they put her ass away. I'm just kinda sad i can't point and laugh when they do. Not that i'm bitter or anything

linky link to video

not sure if that thing actually works.

link to story

I'm kinda happy My morals keep scolding me for that. But seriously. She's an awful person, or she was in middle/high school. Doesn't seem like she's changed much.

SO how's your day been?

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Every few minutes by tongue get caught in between two of my teeth... that can`t be normal - Mood:Good
Tuesday November 18 20082:31:50 PM |
I can't see any kind of gap between them. But a bit of tongue keeps getting stuck between and holy hell that hurts.

Face hurts less today

F*cking freezing outside.
I hate winter.

I skipped my first class. I should go to my second. But goddamn i don't want to.

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