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Female, 36 years old
ny, Western US

  Offline - Last On: 399days 10 hours ago

18 Buddies
28 Subscribers
44,918 Profile Views
52,540 Posts | Member Since: 7/25/2002
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i won`t have to anymore jon groff
NicolesLove


Interests: Dogs / Dancing / Games / Theater / Singing
Homepage: (None)
Birthday:10/11/1985 (36 Years Old)
IM Type: MSN IM Name:
Occupation: Dancer
Marital Status: Married
Sexual Preference: (Decline to State)
Religion: Other
Politics: (Decline to State)
Fav. Movie: good will hunting, you`ve got mail, dead poets
Fav. TV Show: House, macgyver, poker
Fav. Book: Without You by Anthony Rapp
Fav. Song: i like broadway :-) and singer/songwriters
Fav. Food: Donuts
Fav. Car: bah. walkings where its at
 
Theme 'evanescence2' created by NicolesLove
Active Journal Entries | Archived Journal Entries

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And he went with a quack and a waddle and a quack/ I am thinking I am not the average 23 year old. - Mood:Good
Tuesday May 12 200911:49:52 PM |
I am all excited!!!! I got a new CD. Which CD you ask? The Best of Danny Kaye

I'm kinda hungry. But i can't eat anything, because i killed my stomach with pizza earlier

Good pizza though mmmmmmm

So. Should I try to find something bland to eat, should i just not eat anything else, or should i be an idiot and eat more pizza?

There are 12 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I just quoted Bob Marley in my Modern History final essay. - Mood:Good
Tuesday May 12 20093:57:16 AM |
I am losing my mind man. I'm on page 3 of a 4-6 page essay.. that along with ANOTHER 4-6 page essay is due by 1pm tomorrow.

I'm never gonna make it man, i'm never gonna make it. I'm already a bit loopy. And sound kinda high in my essay.

I don't wanna write another one.

Someone talk to me to keep me sane and on track

If you were president, what policies would you make/ change?


I have skittles crazy cores And soda pop. And chips. And I have to pee.

Just a touch of love just a touch of love

I will be your father figure put your tiny hand in mine,

*does the robot*

There are 9 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

"They are spilling out the top of this bra. My boobs have never spilled out the top of anything!" - Mood:Good
Monday May 11 200911:21:08 PM |
They are freaking me out man.

Oh my. I was so just molesting and poking at my boobs as a buncha guys walked by...

Anyway. They hurt And on't fit in my bra. Bah.

I am writing a paper right now. Yes I am. Kinda.

I have to write two 4-6 page essays in the next 12 hours. Fun times.

Then i have another 4-6 due friday, a 2 page due friday, a one page due saturday and 2 more one pages due friday.

I'm throwing a party Wed or Thurs. A nicole-esque type party. Where there will at most be three of us, playing video games, board games, watching a movie and eating cinnamon buns.

Someone write these papers for me. I am so over modern history.

And someone make my boobs shrink. My bf may cry though.

I don't wanna buy new bras

Hows your night going? Distract me will ya?

There are 56 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

What can make my boobs get bigger? (a girly journal) - Mood:Good
Sunday May 10 200911:25:30 PM |
Other than implants and pregnancy.

I noticed they looked bigger. And I have more than a handful now.
I didn't say anything about it to my boyfriend. But he said "hey, are your boobs getting bigger?"

So he noticed too, I'm not delusional

Birth control? I've been on it two months now. Just noticed the boobage change in the past couple days.

They are kinda.. harder and slightly more tender too.

Do you still get PMS on the pill? Like the whole precramping/ boob changes/ before period zit?

I started the placebo pills today and last week i got a giant 'period' type zit. Coincidence or does the pill not prevent PMS?

Anyway.

My neighbors hate me. HATE me. And my bf. Actually they hate the both of us together.

I'm kind of embarrassed to leave my room now.

What I have done so far to avoid writing my paper:

There are 20 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

The hilllllllllllls are alive.. with the sound of moaning and bed squeaking from my neighbor. (AHHHhhhhhhhhh) - Mood:Good
Saturday May 09 20094:34:59 AM |
Yea i know its pointless to make a journal at 4:30am YT time.

But i'm wide awake.

There's a Danny Kaye movie on one of the HBos

There's a wind advisory for tomorrow I love getting blown around.

I'm kinda tempted to stay up until all hours since... I can. I have finals and whatnot due all this week but nothing early. So what is the difference between going to bed at midnight and getting up at 9am and going to bed at 7am and waking up at 4pm? Still the same amount of hours to do my work. I work better in the wee hours anyway.

I do believe i will work on my History final tomorrow so in case the bf has Sunday off i can get together with him without feeling guilty and leaving all the work for Monday. Which is slightly impossible.

There are 2 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I just had the weirdest dinner ever. - Mood:Good
Friday May 08 20099:03:26 PM |
I had shrimp, a cookie and a lemon donut. I only feel slightly sick.

My walls are still pounding.

I went shopping For food. While talking on the phone with my gram

I am so sick of hearing about weddings. SO SICK of it.

I also feel like i'm surrounded by pregnant people.

I have sherbet melting all over my counter. But i don't wanna get up. Go down the hall. Throw it away. Come back.
So.. there it melts.

I wanna go to the dance building and dance. Hm. I have an hour and a half to do it.

I really should take a shower sometime soon. But that requires getting up too.


Ok Reba just made me tear up.

I should write a paper. Or 5. But i don't wanna. I decided that today would be my day off. And i'll start all that Finals crap tomorrow.

I have shrimp. But no lemon

There are 7 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Brock The Port/ I missed an opportunity to whore my dancing/ I don`t know what to do with myself/ what to buy?/ Illegal flowers/ etc - Mood:Good
Friday May 08 20094:31:34 PM |
Apparently there is a giant party going on outside. Brock the Port, is the huge campus/ (town?) wide party for woo end of the year. Food, music (sugarcult apparently.. who i've never heard of), inflatables, dancing.. etc. OH and the drinking. Can't forget the drinking.
I'm not a very social/ party type person. So i am in my room Watching my walls pound.

So i performed the last couple nights. I went into class today and half had seen me and the other half hadn't and really wanted me to get up and dance so they could see
Which sucks! Cuz i am a performer yo I would be happy to dance for anyone, anytime
But i had literally rolled out of bed, put on pants and went to class. So i was half asleep, sore, and didn't have any music

(cont)

There are 14 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

As he cries out to the heavens, "I am not my father`s son" - Mood:Good
Wednesday May 06 200911:45:48 PM |
So, I am partying my little heart out in the empty dance building again.

Which again, consists of me blaring music, singing along and YTing

I'm kinda.. content at the moment. or numb But i have no 50 million different thoughts running through my head....

I'm kinda tired though. But even when i'm tired i can ramble on about nothing forever

i am keeping time in this song with my eyebrow. Its interesting.

I'm the son of rage and love

I still have stage make up on right now. Its half disturbing half ooo i look pretty.

Its raining out

I have some inner rage going on actually at the moment. But i don't wanna talk about it

I am tried and its not even midnight. Thats just not right.

There are 2 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg - Mood:Good
Wednesday May 06 20093:13:40 PM |
Someone make the nervous go away!

Its so annoying.

Ok. Whats the worst that can happen? I suck. So what. they won't let me into the dance program anyway.
but the bfs gonna be there. and he's never seen me dance.
oh well.

It is my goal to suck! yes. If i plan on sucking i won't be nervous and therefore can do my poo better

Make the nervous go away.

There are 10 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Don`t you people know what happened today??? - Mood:Good
Tuesday May 05 200910:47:34 PM |
The Tony Awards Nominations were announced!!!!!!

Next to Normal got 11!!! Jenn D got one!!! YAY

As did Raul

Ah. I wish you people knew what i was talking about.

So I'm performing tomorrow. And realized i have to switch my song. I am changing my song 16 hours before i have to perform it.
I'm insane.
Its an improv dance. Its 6 minutes long because i don't have time to chop it down. And that is after (or before, i don't know the order yet) I am in another piece, an african piece.


Griffin, if you are around, come see me Though Thursdays dance is better

*nervous*

Hi.

There are 17 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Sherry, Sherry baby, Sherry, Sherry baby, Sheerrrrrrrryyy baby, (Sherry baby), Sherry cane you come out tonight? - Mood:Good
Tuesday May 05 20091:36:47 AM |
Why don't you come out to my twist party?

I keep getting ignored

I'm having another party in the dance building Just me, Otis (my laptop), music blasting, being a dork and dancing and singing about.

I'm gonna miss it when the semester ends

I am very, very, very bad. I have done none of the following:

- picked a major
- registered for classes for fall
- gotten a summer job
- written my final paper
- anything really

It'll catch up with me eventually.

I have grape soda

I'm all out of shape which is very bad. Since i have to perform wed/thurs and need stamina.

Bah.

Whats up?
Wanna come party with me?

There are 8 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I`ve decided i am locking myself in my room for the next 3 months. - Mood:Good
Monday May 04 20094:09:14 PM |
Theres a case of the swine flu here, but seriously, ANY kind of flu scares me. It comes with the germophobe/ emetophobia/ missssserable sick peopleness.

So i am going to live in my room and not leave for 3 months during the summer. Actually. Maybe make some cakeballs and sell them, but other than that, no leaving!

I think my boyfriends sick. Nicole is not amused. I kiss that boy man. I swear to god if i am sick for the most important performances of the semester/ finals i'm going to hunt that boy down.

i have killed 3 spiders in the exact same spot, and one across the room in the past 3 days. PLUS, I woke up to a spider crawling across my arm early this morning That was unpleasant. UNPLEASANT. I am traumatized for life.
Where are they coming from??!! First fruit flies and now spiders. I want the fruit flies back.

Hi.

There are 37 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Mama who bore me.. mama who gave me no way to handle things... mama the angels who made me so sad. - Mood:Good
Sunday May 03 200910:49:28 PM |
zomg i'm so nervous. Performance on weds and thurs both improv

The boyfriend... totally flipped. He's making time for me. He's being sweet. He's setting time aside to talk to me, actual conversations. Actually listening to me, and telling me things. I've stopped freaking out and that helped a lot We are still talking things very slowly. But things are actually quite decent between us at the moment.

Holy crap man.

I went shopping today. Bought a crapload of food and whatnot. I have 100$ of dining dollars i HAVE to spend in 2 weeks or i lose it. So i'm trying to stock up on crap from the snack store that doesn't go bad, like little debbie stuff, cupcakes and cookies, and cereal and soup.

Then i went to wegmans and got very little but very expensive crap stupid face that needs face wash. and room that needs lysol wipes. and and... whatever else i got.

There are 15 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

WWooooo, being crazy has its benefits sometimes. - Mood:Good
Saturday May 02 20099:12:47 PM |
One of the dorm buildings here, one of the high rises, is closed for renovations next year. That means any room can can be made into a triple will be, any room that can possibly fit more people, will.

As of right now there are 40 single rooms (one person) on campus. I'm not sure how many can be made into doubles.

I applied for housing next semester, put that i don't mind having roommates. I checked the box for "i would be interested in a single" if available. Didn't rank any of the buildings that had single rooms in my top buildings i want to live in next semester.

I am a senior, i actually get quite a bit of rank for what i pick cuz i have a crap load of credits.

They put me in a single. In a freshman dorm Freshman are HELLA annoying. And loud.
Why? Because i am the 'crazy cutter girl'. Even though i haven't caused ANY problems, had ANY issues since last September.

There are 26 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

My mind is actually..... quiet. - Mood:Good
Saturday May 02 20093:57:27 PM |
I have some weird ass dreams.

I am considering going down and making pancakes. but then i have to go down to the stove. i want some eggs. Don't have any though.

oh my god. i can't think of anything else to write! whats wrong with me! I am ramble my way through 4 journals a day.

bah

my ceiling was leaking. that was unpleasant.

So. pancakes or egg salad sandwich? or leftover turkey sandwich?

And hows your day been?

There are 12 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

These dreams go on when i close my eyes, every second of the night i live another life - Mood:Good
Thursday April 30 20092:24:46 PM |
So i had a lovely dream. I was home, and there was a party of sorts, people all over my grandma's house. A family/ dance studio party perhaps. I was in this sorta on sorta off relationship with Joe. People were all aww i'm sorry.

Then this girl i used to dance with (who i've had a crush on forever) wanted to talk to me, so we go outside, on the porch. Its dark out and pouring rain. A girl named Mia follows us, oblivious and starts chatting and i'm like, hey you stay here and watch our bags i'm gonna go talk to (name) over there.
(cont)

There are 25 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Snippets. - Mood:Good
Wednesday April 29 20099:41:16 PM |
The look on my grandma's face last Saturday when, at intermission of a show we were at, i took a birth control pill, was priceless. A mixture of fear, anger, judgmentalness, sadness and confusion.

I have a veggie tray. But.. I think its going to go bad before i can eat it all My caliuflower froze in my fridge and got gross

My grandpa slipped me a 20$ YAY I am so getting a pizza next week.

GRIFFIN! GO TO DIME A DANCE AGAIN THIS YEAR!
I have a different dance for each day May 6th and 7th, wed and thurs of next week

I had a hot dog, broccoli, snickers, cookies, and some chips and i'm still hungry

Something smells like ass, actually, rotting food, in my room. And i'm not sure what it is I've searched my room. Can't find where its coming from.

Has anyone seen my mojo?

There are 22 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

WTF is a purse party?? - Mood:Good
Tuesday April 28 20098:30:30 PM |
I just invited to one. It sounds scary. And full of girly squealing and "lYkE omg"ing.

Ok. Plans for the night:

- Laundry
- Clean/ tidy room
- Possibly go dance at around 10:30pm.

Not in my plans for the night:

- Change any already set plans if boy decides to actually show up.
- Eat anymore! goddammit.

My hair is not working today.

Anyone wanna have a laundry party with me?

Why do people say they might do things they never follow through on?

There are 25 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

help me pick out a phone?/ food/ I so have no willpower - Mood:Good
Monday April 27 200911:19:42 PM |
I went shopping For food!!!!

Its exciting. Seriously! I have a veggie tray, cookies, donettes, baked beans, mashed potatoes, chicken fingers, and mayo
I'm all kinds of happy.

I am due for a phone upgrade, and my phone keeps randomly turning itself off so i'm thinking i should take it.

I want a phone that flips up (the old fashion way), lets me have homemade ringtones, has a camera, can text. Has an alarm. Thats pretty much it. OH and bluetooth.

Annnnd.. find me a phone


SO willpower. The boy. I feel like i need a sponsor. A "you stupid girl, don't call him, let him sweat it out, you desperate f*ck PUT DOWN THE PHONE" person.
I don't want him to think everythings okay between us. But it is SO hard not to text him/ leave him messages like i always used to do.
I am a chatterbox man.
I don't do shutting up, and i don't do willpower well. At ALL. I have NONE.

There are 52 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

My Rent review and sappy sisterly love - Mood:Good
Sunday April 26 200912:02:43 AM |
OmG adam and anthony Their voices are LOVE. Damn they still got it. NO ONE can do One Song Glory justice like Adam does. Just.. not possible.

BLASPHEMY but i like Matt Caplan's Tango: Maureen better

And there are little things, like Jeremy's (roger) table throwing during "alllll your words are nice Mimi" and Manley's "hand cuff dance" that i missed from Adam's but seriously. Its Adam. I forgive.

I have never seen a Mimi i liked. But i actually liked this one

fun facts:
-watching Adam in the background is so amusing. He doesn't sit still.
- Anthony. Dancing. That's all.
- Adam has a nice ass. As does the girl who played Mimi
- I wonder if the two of them ever think "oh my god... 13 years later and I am STILL doing this"
- I worried for their knees They are old now yo, and were jumping off tables and chairs and whatnot.

(cont)

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I`m bored yo - Mood:Good
Saturday April 25 20095:01:45 PM |
I'm home. I came home to go to the theatre with my gram and aunt. Going to see rent.

I'm bored out of my mind though.

I can be online 24/7 at the dorms, so.. being on grams computer all day long isn't that big a thing, and it what i usually do when here.
There's nothing on tv.
I went outside and enjoyed the sun, read some magazines.

Joe and I are kinda weird. Since he made me mad and I spazzed at him yesterday.

I kinda feel like dressing up. I think i will. Both today and tomorrow. I brought a casual dress with me. There is a slight chance that me and Joe may do something tomorrow (but probably won't happen). So, either way, when i get up, i'm throwing on my dress, slapping on some make up and doing my hair.

At least it'll give me something to do, to help the boredom. Plus I haven't dressed up in awhile. And I feel kinda good about how I look recently.

There are 17 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

YAY! I actually get to perform tonight (pics) - Mood:Good
Friday April 24 20095:27:11 PM |
I've been sick all week, missing all the rehearsals and one of the performances

But i'm.. mostly better now, and i AM dancing tonight



Awful pictures, yes.

I have to miss tomorrow shows cuz I have tickets to Rent. And i may not make it back here in time for sunday afternoons show

Bah.

Anyways.

Let's hope i actually don't look like an idiot

And don't like.. puke onstage or anything.

There are 21 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Haven`t you heard the word of your body? - Mood:Good
Thursday April 23 20097:46:05 PM |
Ok so. I feel awful. I have some kind of disease. Its like i have a different illness everyday. One day my throat killed, one day my nose is stuffed/running, one day i kept coughing and sneezing and today my nose is fine but my stomach is soooo off.

I have no food left. but to get more i'd have to go shopping. Which would not only mean i'd have to get up from laying in my comfy warm bed, but i'd have to walk up and walk back.

On one hand i am out of food, and good food could help me get better. Plus i could get some kind of meds

On the other. i feel awful. i have a headache. and my stomach hurts. and it took me 30 minutes to get up the energy to grab my laptop.

but i need food.

There are 9 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I think you worried for me then., the sutble way that i give in, but i know you like the show - Mood:Good
Wednesday April 22 20096:03:42 PM |
Ok. So, the huge concert of the year, dance and drum concert, HUGE extravaganza, that i was f*cking REPLACED in, is this weekend.

I was in 2 dances out of about 12, 1 of them EVERYONE is in, its the finale. The other 9 were choreographed by other people, at other times. One i wasn't cast in but i get that, i was new to that dance.

The dance that was choreographed on me, however, and 9 other girls, i was f*cking replaced and have no idea why.

Anyway. So rehearsals have been going on all week, tech rehearsals. Me and one other girl, out of like 40, are the only two ONLY in the last finale dance. We are kinda bitter.
But moreso because we had to be there EVERY damn night this week, from 6:30-10pm.. for nothing. We weren't even in the damn thing.

(cont)

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you know that i could use somebody, someone like you - Mood:Good
Monday April 20 200910:41:51 PM |
So I haven't left my room all day. I spent all of last night (after i got off here anyway) walking around outside trying not to cry. I watched the sun come up. That was nice.

So. I talked the boy when i got up, on aim. And we went from bitterness to semi fighting/arguing, to going whoa, look what happens when we actually TALK to each other. All this sh*t that we didn't tell each other before for some reason for 7 hours.

So we decided to try to be close friends for awhile, learn about each other as friends, and see where that leads, each us hating each other, getting back together or just staying friends.

I didn't go to class this morning. There was no way. I slept through it.

Then didn't go to rehearsals. Because i'm still bitter about not being cast in anything and not really having to go to rehearsals, though i do.

I want my ex back. Not this one, the one before him.

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