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Female, 30 years old
athens, georgia, Southern US

  Offline - Last On: 775days 5 hours ago

2 Buddies
75 Subscribers
11,899 Profile Views
23,822 Posts | Member Since: 6/18/2004
Link to this profile:

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Interests: Books / Writing / Partying / Philosophy / Singing
Homepage: (None)
Birthday:9/22/1991 (30 Years Old)
IM Type: (Decline to State) IM Name:
Occupation:
Marital Status: Single
Sexual Preference: Bisexual
Religion: Other
Politics: (Decline to State)
Fav. Movie: yellow submarine
Fav. TV Show: weeds
Fav. Book: the rubaiyat of omar khayyam
Fav. Song:
Fav. Food: vegetarian
Fav. Car:
 
Theme 'dancing bears' created by LostMarbles
Active Journal Entries | Archived Journal Entries

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The last time I posted here I was turning 18. 3 weeks ago I turned 28. - Mood:Good
Thursday October 10 201910:16:17 PM |
Hard to even begin to describe all that's passed in that decade. Why bother?

Lately? I've been feeling really burnt out and trying to go easy on myself as I figure out how to dig myself out of this hole and find the energy to keep pushing.

I've been running like crazy for two years. Two really high-stress jobs. I've started making enough money playing music that it's a real career on top of that, but even that has its costs. Trying to chase too many dreams all at once has me crashing.

I don't know why I came back here. Guess it feels like a safe place in a world where things are coming at me nonstop. YTers were my closest friends when I had none.

So thanks for that, YT. Hope y'all have been well? How would you describe your decade?

There are 49 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I turn 18 this month. - Mood:Good
Wednesday September 03 200811:17:53 PM |
Last time I wrote a journal entry, I was turning 17.

Last time I wrote a journal entry, I bemoaned my carlessness. Now I have a car. At least, I pay to be on my friend's insurance. It works out, generally.

I Applied at IU last week, when a year ago I said I never would 'cause I "couldn't." What a load. Year-ago me didn't think she could do anything and, as follows, never did anything.

Now I know better.

There are 4 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I turn 17 next saturday! - Mood:Good
Wednesday September 12 20076:51:39 PM |
It's the first birthday I've been excited about in a while!

I was going to wait and post a thread then but I was feeling kind of sad this afternoon.

I still don't have a job, or a license, or much anything else, but I do feel really great generally.

I ran my mini-marathon last Saturday. I can't believe I actually did it. I was nowhere near prepared, but I walked a lot of it and took it in little bites. I'm probably going to run another in January.

Well that's everything huge. What's been up with you.

There are 10 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Reporting Live from Boulder, Colorado, the chinese food capital o` the world (pictures!) - Mood:Exhausted
Wednesday July 18 20071:49:46 AM |
Excluding China, naturally.

Was this a good vacation? Well, it wasn't the beach, but it WAS poorly planned, I'll give you that. We kept leaving our directions in strange places and getting lost in even stanger ones. I'm not ready to go home, regardless.

from the Celestial Seasonings tea factory which we toured yesterday:


tea bag dress!

(sorry theres only a couple. uploading pics from mah phone is a bitch on the road)

the mountains, which are breathtaking in person:

the mariachi band at 3 margaritas:

and, in parting,

There are 9 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

My computer is hungry and I cannot feed it - Mood:Confused
Monday July 16 20072:00:39 AM |
It's plugged into the wall, into the converter. The cord is plugged into it. And yet it says it's about to die.

I don't understand, compy. What more do you want from me.

Can somebody out there explain this to me?

There are 8 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Tell me your artistic ideas. - Mood:Ecstatic
Saturday July 07 20079:21:32 PM |
I've been full of them this afternoon.

Wouldn't it be neat to, instead of having a couch in the living room, lay a blanket? Then, on the wall behind it, you could paint the shore and the sunset!

I really want to do that in my house, when I get one.

Also, I thought about making a lantern out of a watering can. You cut a hole in the front side, maybe a heart or a star. Then the smoke drifts out the top.

There were others, but they've probably been done before. I might post them later.

Tell me your ideas! I promise I won't steal them. I have no artistic ability.

There are 81 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Any parents out there? - Mood:Confused
Friday July 06 20073:48:41 PM |
I feel like my mother is smothering me. I can't tell if she really is. It has occured to me that perhaps I'm just insensitive. Perhaps I should help her through this rough patch and be sympathetic.

I just get so tired of propping her up constantly.

Then again, she did birth me. I owe her.

I think I need a parental perspective on this.

There are 18 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

The Pixies are good therapy. - Mood:Spent
Sunday July 01 200710:00:19 PM |
Listening to them is like hanging with your drunk friends without worrying about them puking on you.

I think I'm bad company. I don't laugh. I'm not good with conversation. I don't put out. I should skip the integrating with society part and go straight for a leper colony.

And I'm stressed out 'cause my religious zealot grandmother and aunts (and other unnamed relatives I could hear in the background) are on their way here.

But Black Francis has me now, so everything will be a-ok.

How're you all? (New theme and avy)

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The walls are gliding up like movie credits, the furniture is floating away.... - Mood:Ashamed
Friday June 29 20075:03:45 PM |
Guitar Hero is, I must say, the most cost-efficient hallucinogen in the world. Whenever I play for a while and then stop, everything in the room starts trying to escape gravity for, oh, two or three minutes. High addiction factor, though. Pooey.

Mini training update: I'm starting to lose faith. I went out for my 3 mile run today and quit 2 and a half miles in. I'm such a loser.

I was going to say something else but I forgot, so let's get to it then, eh?

There are 13 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Looking for houses, mini-marathon training, new Netflix movies - Mood:Hopeful
Thursday June 28 200710:48:56 PM |
Tomorrow morning I'm supposed to run 3 miles as a part of my mini-marathon training. In preparation, I'm going to procrastinate sleep as much as possible because, as everyone knows, in not sleeping you delay the next day.

(In all seriousness, does anyone else do this? The procrasination thing, not the running.)

Went looking for houses today. There's this gorgeous run-down vine-covered beauty, lakefront, with a terrace and a fire pit and other groovy add-ons like that. I want it so. When I'm flawless and popular, I can imagine having the best bonfires there. (Heh.)

Soylent Green and The Birds came in the mail today. Whee.

Pass the time with me.

There are 25 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I started my running program today! - Mood:Good
Tuesday June 26 200710:08:02 AM |
The race is in September, if I decide to run it. It's a mini-marathon and, after today's suprisingly hard jog (two miles, with some hills) I dunno if I'll make it.

I can feel the endorphins kicking in, though. It feels great. And plus I'm eating grapes.

I wish I had a running partner to make the miles go by quicker... but everyone I know is lazy.

There are 15 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

all the leaves are brown, and the sky is gray - Mood:Sad
Monday June 25 20072:21:30 PM |
I wish I could go walking here, but I'm always reminded of camp. It's so nice there. Trees, air, nature, un-f*cked-around-with.

Yesterday I went up to Bloomington with my dad's girlfriend's daughter, Christie, to check out IU (and Bloomington in general). It's a fascinating place. I had a peanut butter milkshake (!) and we ate at a Tibetan restaurant owned by the Dalai Lama's brother owns!

I'd love to go to school there, but I looked but the requirements and there's no way I could get in. Maybe I'll live there one day, like Christie does.

How's life, brah?

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I got to move I got to fiiiiind me a quiet place - Mood:Indifferent
Wednesday June 06 200712:57:50 AM |
School ended today, quietly and shamelessly, like a candle being snuffed out. I plan to spend the summer ruthlessly editing my life. You know. Cutting the bullshxt and adding the things it's missing. That whole shpiel.

My school persona is really what has been extinguished here. All meaningful connections built on it have vanished. It feels good and bad. I have to start from the beginning again, but I can start bigger and better and aware of it.

So...

There are 13 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

dogoodnik projects 1-3 - Mood:Good
Monday May 28 200711:36:17 PM |
1. steal trees from the roadsides, plant them in people's yards at night, nuture them (the trees, or the people if they pay well) until they're big enough to survive on their own.

2. script a philosophical conversation and have it somewhere full of lonely people and eavesdroppers, like a cafe or a high school cafeteria.

3. I haven't thought of the third one yet, and I am also tired, so this space is for you.

I bought books today

There are 20 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

It`s bad enough that you sell your waking life for minimum wage, but now they get your dreams for free. - Mood:Hopeful
Monday May 28 200710:15:19 AM |

I've been neglecting my dream journal for ages and, finally, when I get it reorganized and restarted, I remember nothing upon waking for three consecutive days. Usually when I pop up in the morning I have distinct and vivid memories of my dreams and that's without making a conscious effort.

So I guess it follows that when I try, it doesn't work.

Any dreamers out there? Figuratively or literally, if you please.

There are 16 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

please drink and drive - Mood:Disgusted
Saturday May 05 200711:10:32 PM |
So I went to the Kentucky Derby today and we were down in the infield with the really drunk drunks.
We're talking sprint-across-the-top-of-the-portapottys, show-me-your-boobs, naked-cartwheel drunks.

I could neither bet nor drink, so the novelty wore off in the first two hours.

As we left, the police officers monitoring the drunky drunks were encouraging people to chug their beers as they left the downs for the parking lot...

Someone pinch me, please.

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I need more fat friends - Mood:Naughty
Friday May 04 20073:31:54 AM |
I took the whole carton of ice cream out of the freezer, poured a little honey and chocolate in it and now I'm here.

Tell me, how do you define having a "taste" for art? I always thought it meant having a little background knowledge about the art you like, or else knowing what it is you like about art, but then again, I'm an elitist pig.

Or maybe just a pig. Oink oink.

There are 32 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I`m too scared to sleep - Mood:Confused
Monday April 30 20073:08:30 AM |
What kind of logic is this?

One procrastinates sleep because he or she doesn't want to WAKE UP?

Who taught me this? And why do I still believe it works?

Pictures soon, if I feel like it.

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I step on books - Mood:Good
Sunday April 29 20072:15:54 AM |
Just joking.

The first domino was going to the planetarium with Science Club. Dark Side of the Moon Laser Show.

Second domino, euphoria.

Third domino, going to barnes and noble and not feeling guilty when I purchased almost 100 dollars worth of books.

Fourth domino, suddenly realizing I really really am broke now, no joking, no savings anymore, nothing.

Fifth domino, applying for a job at Subway. A friend of mine works there and she kissed the manager's ass quite a lot, but let us keep our fingers x'd.

What's the last book you bought?

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excuse me, ma`am, we speak AMERKAN in AMERKA. - Mood:Ashamed
Tuesday April 03 20077:19:26 PM |
So much for expanding my cultural horizons.

So there's this girl. She's really sweet and polite, but she's Guatemalan and doesn't speak much English. She always tries to talk to me in Spanish, since we're in the same Spanish class, but I clam up every time.
I'm scared I'll sound stupid, you know? And I feel bad 'cause nobody really talks to her.

jkfwfmwaeojfwa. Advice?

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Eh, as long as theres no place to go... - Mood:Indifferent
Saturday February 17 20071:06:13 PM |
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

My mom got me a new cell phone for a late v-tines day present, which I feel horrible about it. It's a really nice one and I know I'm never going to use it, but it felt wrong to refuse.

Still, it's probably the coolest and most confusing device I have ever seen. Love!

It's snowing like hell (oxymoron much?) outside, which is of no benefit to me since I already have a four-day weekend this week. No school friday, no school monday, and I'm thinking of skipping next Friday because all my friends are going to a music clinic I didn't get in to. Your thoughts.

Tell me somethin' good! (YOWW!)

There are 37 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Honk if you have self control issues/hate libraries - Mood:Exhausted
Thursday February 15 20077:07:19 PM |
I went to the library for the first time since 7th grade, and I remember now why it's been so long.

I like bookstores because I am always broke. There's a limit, see. You have to settle, depressing as it is. But still, it does the self-control thing for me. Libraries, it's kind of a free for all. There isn't anything stopping you from checking out ten books except common sense, which I lack.

After much pining and bickering with myself I ended up leaving with A High Wind in Jamaica by Richard Hughes... which I am now regretting without even opening. It's one of those catch 22 things I guess.

My week is over. It wasn't sh*tty, just normal with sh*tty undertones (e.g. dead cats, flubbing tests, finishing amazing novels) threatening to usurp, so tell me about yours.

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Come here and say witty things so I can pass them off as my own later on - Mood:Bored
Wednesday February 07 200710:18:12 PM |
Yeah, I do it. So what. I'm boring and desperate.

Have you ever gotten sad from not feeling nostalgic? Like, you look at a childhood toy, and you remember playing with it, but you don't feel any sort of connection to it. Or something similiar.

Just joking. Don't respond to that. Say something funny and outlandish so I can pretend to be witty at school tomorrow.

(But seriously, do you?)

There are 15 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

ask me anything/pictures inside!/something else to get your attention - Mood:Frightened
Thursday February 01 20078:57:19 PM |
I don't want to be on YT anymore, I've got this really gritty, suffocated, paralyzed feeling and I honestly don't know what else to do.

This is my favorite gif ever.

Now its your turn. Ask me anything!

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ask me anything/pictures inside!/something else to get your attention - Mood:Frightened
Thursday February 01 20078:57:19 PM |
I don't want to be on YT anymore, I've got this really gritty, suffocated, paralyzed feeling and I honestly don't know what else to do.

This is my favorite gif ever.

Now its your turn. Ask me anything!

There are 46 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

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