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Male, 22 years old

  Offline - Last On: 5157days 18 hours ago

367 Buddies
284 Subscribers
6,233 Profile Views
1,646 Posts | Member Since: 8/7/2005
Link to this profile:

(No profile music for HeifenSmoker)

Interests: Music / Forensics
Homepage: Click Here
Birthday:1/1/1999 (22 Years Old)
IM Type: (Decline to State) IM Name:
Occupation: Rhomboid
Marital Status: (Decline to State)
Sexual Preference: (Decline to State)
Religion: Pagan
Politics: (Decline to State)
Fav. Movie: L`ennui, The Sacrifice, Funny Games.
Fav. TV Show: HardTalk
Fav. Book: Kazuo Ishiguro - The Unconsoled.
Fav. Song: Kagel - The Pieces of the Compass Rose.
Fav. Food: Clambake.
Fav. Car: Decline to State
Theme 'In Bread' created by HeifenSmoker
Active Journal Entries | Archived Journal Entries

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Journals. - Mood:Good
Wednesday October 17 200710:17:04 PM |
Note: All journals should be posted in this thread.
There are 3 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Wednesday September 27 20068:27:47 PM |
ZOunds! What just happened!

I leave the computer for like five minutes and all anarchy breaks loose.

I am sorry you had to see that. I hope it did not corrupt you in any way.

It was not my doing but that of someone who assumed an apical position in the virtual reality fantasy land of HeifenSmoker

With continuing regards,


There are 22 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

As flies to wanton boys, are we to the mods; They kill us for their sport. - Mood:Good
Sunday September 17 20068:36:21 PM |

Our Moderator which art in Heaven,
Hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy Website come,
Thy Will be done,
In YouThink, As it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily thread,
And forgive us our posts,
As we forgive them that post against us.
And lead us not into generals,
But deliver us from evil.
For Thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory,
For ever and ever.

There are 69 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

A New Journal Entry From HeifenSmoker Which Has No Aspirations To Offer Anything At All To The People Of YT. - Mood:Nothing At All
Monday August 21 20067:32:38 PM |
It has been created to offer nothing at all.

It has not been created to 'spam'.

It has not been created to endear the people of YT to HeifenSmoker.

It has not been created to amuse.

It has not been created to spark debate.

It has not been created to be informative.

It has not been created to be creative.

It has not been created to induce anger or indeed any reaction at all.

It has not been created to offer any advice or words of wisdom.

It has not been created to be supercilious.

It has not been created to resolve any of HeifenSmoker's personal issues.

It has not been created for posterity.

It has not been created as a result of divine inspiration or political motivations, or indeed any motivation at all.

It has not been created to enable HifenSmoker to view, track or respond to any subsequent posts that may occur in it.

It has not been created for personal gain.

It has not been created out of malice or out of altruism.

There are 35 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

It Has Become Increasingly Clear That HeifenSmoker`s R**ster Needs Glasses........... - Mood:Good
Friday August 18 20067:08:37 PM |
HeifenSmoker has got a small r**ster.
There are 27 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

What nonsense is HeifenSmoker spouting now........? Surely HeifenSmoker will bring about his own downfall by spouting such nonsense..............? - Mood:Good
Wednesday August 16 200610:03:02 PM |
If viewed as a complex monism, the pellucid duality that manifests itself in the midst of the bifurcation erected between 'journals' and 'generals' comes to represent a stark anomaly in the overarching scheme existing within the sub-menu that lurks subordinately beneath the apically capitalised and omniferous 'FORUMS'. This phenomena has engendered the progressive spread of an alienating miasma that, through contradistinction, separates the intellective potentialities of our poster-protagonists. Consequently, the democratic autonomy offered by the discrete sub-categories that are dragooned beneath our autocratic mother-category, is undermined and subsequently quashed. Surely, a glorious amalgamation of 'journals' and 'generals' into a symbiotic unity would dispel any arbitrary excrescence and generate the arcadian reign of integration and harmony, implementing decorum and propriety en masse and integrating those 'wandering Jews' into an all-encompassingly fruitful dialectic discourse.
There are 15 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

HeifenSmoker to the Rescue............!!!!!!!!!! - Mood:Nice
Monday August 14 20069:29:26 PM |
There, there. Don't worry. It'll be okay.
There are 26 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

"UNBELIEVABLE" - A thread made by HeifenSmoker. - Mood:Portugal
Sunday August 13 20066:43:21 PM |
Personally, I don't believe in the belief that there is a belief in which people can both believe and not believe while they can believe in the belief that they don't believe in that belief and where believing is better than not believing, when belief offers those people the belief that belief lies in the belief that those who don't believe hold the belief that not believing in itself offers some belief in belief, while that belief in itself is a false belief that ultimately leads to non-belief; when this belief dies and non-believing becomes an alternative belief to the initial belief, those who believe this are on a path of so called belief towards non-belief, or to put it another way, a disbelief in non-belief that leads towards the belief in that belief. I firmly believe this and will always hold this belief in believing in this belief close to my heart. I also believe that those who don't believe in this belief will eventually believe that it is better to believe than not believe.
There are 32 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Oh My Mother F*cking, Overarchingly Malevolent, R**ster Sucking, Ineffectual Dead God... - Mood:PRIAPIC
Thursday August 10 200612:52:01 PM |

Look at the size of HeifenSmoker's Buddy List.

What a lascivious vision of priapic monomania it comes to represent...!


Yours, as ever.


There are 70 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

What a Discerning Bunch of Motherf*ckers those R**stersucking Question Mods are, Eh? - Mood:Good
Wednesday August 09 20068:17:53 PM |
Here are some of my questions that have not been approved. Naturally, HeifenSmoker feels affronted:

1) Have you ever cut your own legs off?

2) What is boobs?

3) Have you ever cut your own arms off?

4) Would you date a black person even if they were black?

5) Have you ever masturbated whilst sh*tting?

6) Have you ever masturbated whilst pissing?

7) Have you ever put your eyes?

8) Have you ever noticed that, after fingering a girl, your hands smells of fanny for at least a day, no matter how many times you wash them?

9) What day is it?

10) How much wood can a wood chuck wood if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

11) What is eye?

12) YouThink is a website?

13) Do you know the way to the shop?

14) Is Jew or not?

15) Hello sir, can I help you?

16) Who wants to join my international terrorist network, "HeifenSmoker's International Terrorist Network"?

17) Do you mind if I smoke in here?

18) ?

There are 36 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Saturday August 05 20067:01:36 PM |
The aim of the game is to come up with a really good name for my ensemble.

I play in an ensemble (piano, violin, cello, flute and clarinet) and we need a name, but are struggling in finding one that we like. The ensemble is devoted to playing contemporary classical music ie. music of the 20th and 21st centuries to things written yesterday!

Put down your suggestions, you can put down as many as you like, and if we like one, then, not only do you have the honour of the ensemble using the name, but you also win a shiny key.

And, go.......

There are 133 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Rolling Around On The Floor Whilst Simultaneously Laughing................ - Mood:Good
Monday July 31 20064:16:03 PM |
Oh My f*cking God. I am like soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
bored. All I did today was like try and kill myself but it like didn't work so I won't do it again so that I can like carry on living and stuff and like maybe get a job and like earn some money and like have some kids and like bring them up like really really well so that they have like really good values and stuff and do like really well at school and like go on to university and like get really good jobs and like get really good jobs and like get really good jobs and have like looooooooooooooooooaaaaads of f*cking kids and perpetuate the family name for generations. Laughing Out Loud With An Air Of Quiet Contentment. Like that would be like sooooooooooooooooooooo cool and stuff and would like make my parents like happy. I like my parents. They are nice people. They have a nice family name.
There are 92 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

What a bunch of f*cking faggots you all are.......... - Mood:Good
Monday July 31 20063:37:54 PM |
It strikes me that our multivalent commentators on YT have an indiscriminate bent towards the fetishisation of content over concept. Note the proliferation of an implacable inability to arrest one's own conclusions and how it promptly stultifies the potentiality of the free imagination to associate itself with a 'concept-catalyst' as opposed to the rigorous exploration of a miasmatic ooze that reeks of standardisation and congeniality. This exaltation of content over concept is indicative of a wider predicament; unable to grasp the conceptual cornucopia, they deny themselves the cathartic journey that lies in the mustering of one's own conclusions; consequently, our commenators become draped by a mantle of standardisation, censorship and mediocrity. There is a prevailing stench of vitriol that is born from an inability to readily identify and judge satire and irony; all engendered by a slavish adherence to an arbitrary conduct that governs content and its appraisal.
There are 79 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

A Thread by HeifenSmoker - Mood:Transcendental
Monday July 31 20062:37:53 PM |
The impetus to make a thread came about very recently; however, it is something I have been contemplating for some time. With inspiration coming from a variety of sources, I wanted to actually 'create' a thread, rather than simply view threads created by others. Having observed and digested a multifarious wealth of threads, I felt that it was now time for me to create my own; a decision that I did not come to lightly. As well as satisfying an urge that has manifested itself in fits and starts of late, generating a plethora of burning desires and fervid cogitation, I felt I would be able to offer something both worthwhile and yet challenging to those people possessing an empathetic affinity with my situation. I only hope that in passing from desire to consummation, I have spawned something of lasting importance; something ordained not for temporal estrangement, but for empyreal transcendentalism in posterity.
There are 51 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I don`t want a f*cking key............ - Mood:CranKEY(HA, HA)
Sunday July 23 200611:44:00 AM |
If anybody buys me a f*cking key, I will f*cking kill them.
There are 53 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

HITLER!!!! JESUS!!!!! BLACK MAN!!!!!! SEX!!!!!!!!!!!! - Mood:Good
Friday July 14 20069:53:03 AM |
The splitting up of a thread, as it emerges into successive pages, and subsequently into discrete autonomous entities, negates the developmental process of a cohesive argument or dialogue and results in a fragmented and incongruous whole. Those who partake in the evolution of a particular thread, and who only read the last page, are inclined to base their intellective contention on the evidence of what they have imbibed from that particular page, thus obliterating the potentiality for the chronological and overarching sweep that should occur in a rational agon. Consequently, threads are composed of conjectures, rather than insightful and empathetic judgements. An inevitable heirarchy is engendered, in which one is favoured by being placed at the apex of a particular page, giving our commentators ample opportunity to respond and intertwine. On the other hand, if one is relegated to the base of this arbitrary heirarchy, then a potential gem lies dormant; ostracised into quiescence.
There are 29 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

JESUS RAPES CHILDREN - Mood:Fine thank you
Tuesday April 25 20067:07:11 PM |
But one cannot blame him, after all, he was only following his father's example.
There are 61 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Monday April 03 20069:18:39 PM |
Heifen just got himself a great porn clip of a woman pissing from her fa**y into a glass (like a wine glass or some similar type of gass) and then drinking it; but really drinking it - like downing it and not spilling any or drooling any onto her chest. I always thought that this could be done via nefarious trickery - like the camera could move and then the piss-filled glass could be replaced with one that has a similarly coloured fluid in it. However, in this great porn clip I got (the one I mentioned earlier), the camera doesn't move, so I am certain that it is authentic and devoid of any nefarious trickery...
There are 13 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

JEWS - Mood:Big Nose
Sunday April 02 200612:37:28 PM |
Like yesterday I woke up in the morning and it was so dark outside and I had like a coffee with two brown sugars in it and like I talked to my nan on the telephone and we talked about Jews.
There are 49 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

"Oh Sh*t", "Oh God", That Fetishistic R**ster HeifenSmoker Is Back. - Mood:Fetishistic
Tuesday February 28 20069:58:28 AM |

There are 27 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Hitler Jesus Black Man Sex - Mood:Good
Sunday January 29 20066:08:28 PM |
Did you know that according to the latest musicological research, Brahms and Clara were in fact the same person. It has been known for a long time that Brahms was homosexual, but this latest development does even more to explain the strange details of his life. For example, it explains the prodigious compositional talent of Schumann's wife, which Schumann obviously tried to cover up. The breakthrough came when traces of Brahms' semen were discovered on some of Schumann's suits. Also, sometimes, when Clara was performing some concerto or other, it appeared to some members of the audience that there was the makings of a beard on her face, or that her corset was holding in remarkable volumes of flesh. It seems clear what conclusion to draw yet to some it might come as a shock.
There are 31 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

How much is that doggy in the window? - Mood:Ontological
Thursday January 19 20066:43:04 PM |
Arf! Arf!
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OMG!!!! HeifenSmoker is a Fetishist........! - Mood:Fetishistic
Sunday January 01 200611:51:22 AM |
Indeed, HeifenSmoker is a fetishist.

I like:

a) Shemales;
b) Oversized, silicone-implanted boobies;
c) Extremely fat women;
d) Black men with huge r**sters.

There are 36 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

OMG!!!!! OMFG!!!!! HeifenSmoker Posted Porn!!!!!!! BAN HIM!!!!!!! *cues mods* - Mood:Pornographic
Saturday November 12 200512:52:45 PM |
There are 44 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Hango, I love thee. - Mood:Good
Tuesday November 08 20057:58:34 PM |
Oh Hango, I love thee.
There are 63 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

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