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15 years ago by Bunbuitchi

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Would you make a good lawyer? See how successful you would be as a lawyer! personality test

There are 9 Comments on this Quiz (View Comments)

1	You have a client who has stolen a mouldy hunk of cheese from Wal-Mart and is sueing the store for selling bad merchandise. Every possible person knows he stole it. What would you do?
I would represent his case! Wal-Mart should sell quality goods, and I hate rotten cheese! Hmm, well he obviously shoplifted. I refuse to represent him. Although bad cheese is an evil thing.. Hmm.. Wal-Mart`s bathrooms have a pipe leak. I could get some really good gaskets for those! Rotten cheese?! Someone get me crowbar. That manager is gonna get a beating..
2	The criminal won $10 million in his case. If you did represent him, how much would you charge him for your services?
I charge 30% and I spent a total of 600 hours on the case. You owe me $3,072,530.20 I don`t know the exact figure, due to the misplacing of some official sheets, but it`s near $897,300 I could buy 150 stainless steel U-curve pipes with only $3,000! What? He won that amount? Where does that jerk live? I`ll go rob him, and take the cheese, too.
3	Your office would most likely be....
Tidy, with oak file cabinets on the walls, a few rare plants, and a fine desk with ballpoint pens. Simple, with a few wooden shelves and cabinets. Some plants near my desk. Near the local dump. It`s so much easier to find rusty pipes and faucets to renew and reuse. In my basement, where I horde "borrowed" socks and gloves.
4	Out of the four, what client would you rather represent?
A good man who is financially stable, sueing to get custody of his dog, Fifi, from his mean wife. A wealthy man who is known as a frequent liar, and sues for pointless reasons. A sink. Myself. I`m going to jail anyway. It may as well be free.
5	Some crazy lady just killed a cat with a rubber chicken! You are forced to represent her in court. What would you convince the jury?
She cannot be charged, because of her unstable conscience. She needs more government funding. She`s pretty wierd, but she didn`t know what she was doing. Well, maybe she did. She`s innocent! She should have asked me for a grade C iron polished tube. I could mend her bath tub in no time. The cat deserved it. Dang cat. She should have eaten it.
6	I am a toilet plunger. What now?
You haven`t been receiving enough attention from your local government. I`ll file a legal complaint. You do look like one, but I can arrange for some legal advice for you. I used you to unclog the toilet. You might need to go wash yourself. Nice! Can I smack that crazy lady with you?
7	Finally, Do you think you`d make a good lawyer?
Yes. If you disagree, I have several references and a 12 page resume to show you. I guess so. Will I get beef from it? Ha! I could unplug that baby in no time! Say, have you considered using lead-based pipes? I stole my lawyer`s fridge last week.