I`m not gonna make it. I know that. I don`t know why i insist on holding on when i know. I don`t know why it got so much more intense.... Who's Online | Find Members | Private Messages
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From the Journal of NicolesLove | mood: Good

Will the circle be unbroken? By and by Lord, by and by.. Theres a better home awaiting, in the sky, Lord, in the sky.

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13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 2:25:13 AM EST (GMT-5)
I'm not gonna make it. I know that. I don't know why i insist on holding on when i know.

I don't know why it got so much more intense. Why i can't fight it off anymore. How the mess i'm in now will always be with me. Because i can't get myself out of this. I can't control it. Its just going to get more f*cked up. and involve more people. Because i can't deal with myself. I'm not gonna make it. I can't. I look ahead and just see tracks and tracks of not knowing what the f*ck is going on, wondering how one person can f*ck things up so bad.
I give up.

YT is slow tonight.

13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 2:26:48 AM EST (GMT-5)
Aren't you too old for fairy tales?
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 2:27:14 AM EST (GMT-5)
You're never too old for fairy tales.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 2:35:07 AM EST (GMT-5)
I'm going to have to go ahead and disagree with you.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 3:13:35 AM EST (GMT-5)
Hey, Nicoles. I think you're cool. And there is hope in the world somewhere. I promise.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 3:15:28 AM EST (GMT-5)
don't be sad, think positive :]
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 3:57:44 AM EST (GMT-5)
You're probably right.

I hear moving to California is the best thing to do when you've lost all hope.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 9:43:22 AM EST (GMT-5)
On Saturday 11/15/08 - 2:25:13 AM NicolesLove wrote:
I'm not gonna make it.

But I'm hungry! I want pancakes! PLEEEEEASE!

Seriously, what's wrong?
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 9:46:06 AM EST (GMT-5)
Please talk to someone professional, Nicole. And someone that will hear you. Bang on doors until the right person appears. I honestly think you deserve better than to be feeling like this.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 11:13:58 AM EST (GMT-5)
come on Nicole, spill it to someone!
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 3:23:23 PM EST (GMT-5)
On Saturday 11/15/08 - 9:46:06 AM chips2001 wrote:
Please talk to someone professional, Nicole. And someone that will hear you. Bang on doors until the right person appears. I honestly think you deserve better than to be feeling like this.


I have been. It doesn't help. I don't talk to people well. I think i'm gonna stop actually. Maybe if i lose it completely i'll get somewhere. Because I can't stay like this, I can't, I won't.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 3:53:47 PM EST (GMT-5)
Read the Bible, it will give you hope.
13 yrs ago, 10 mos ago - Saturday 11/15/08 - 5:07:38 PM EST (GMT-5)
I'll be sure to do that.



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