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Female, 86 years old
., ., Western US

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Grateful Dead! - Mood:Good
Friday April 25 20083:54:48 AM |
best e-mail received from school...evar:

Grateful Dead Archives Given to UCSC
April 24, 2008

To: Members of the UCSC Community
Fr: Ginny Steel, University Librarian
Re: Grateful Dead Archives Given to UCSC

It is a thrill to write to tell you that the surviving members of the iconic rock 'n' roll band, the Grateful Dead, have selected the UCSC Library as the permanent home for their substantial archive of materials documenting the band's history. The collection will be the largest donation ever made to the library's Special Collections Department, and it includes more than 2,000 square feet of memorabilia, artifacts, and other documents. This incomparable archive will undoubtedly become a major resource for research related to the Grateful Dead, the phenomenon of the Deadheads, American music, and popular culture during the last three decades of the 20th century.

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alcohol drinkers everywhere!!! - Mood:Good
Tuesday April 22 20084:15:49 AM |
Paul Anka is an alcohol, right? I keep on looking it up but I keep on finding the person. Lame! Help, i Need it for a poem.
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4:20 - Mood:Good
Sunday April 20 20086:59:05 AM |
anyone care to light up in about twenty minutes?

it's gonna be 4:20 AM in california.

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I feel so good about myself. - Mood:Good
Saturday April 19 200810:24:05 PM |

so on top of being kicked off facebook for basically being a degenerate, my friend decided to tell me that a guy who I had slept with said I was "disturbed" and a "broken soul."


it's not like I don't already struggle with that stigma of myself. My feelings are kinda hurt.
Ah, well. C'est la vie.

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I got banned - Mood:Good
Saturday April 19 20087:10:59 PM |
from facebook.

For having raunchy pictures (which I considered artistic) as my main pic and in an album.



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Pirate revised - Mood:Good
Saturday April 19 20084:06:35 AM |

pirate attempt numero dos

I. Physical
I eye the skull
and crossbones etched inside
his flexing right calf.
When he saked for coffee
with a sideways smile-
what was left of his teeth
were over-ripe banana yellow.
From where I was standing,
they smelled sweet.
I followed the wrinkles on
his neck, an irrigation system fro his sweat,
to the gray cloth he uses to cover
his receding hairline.
"Is that underwear on your head?"
"No. It's the corner of a bed sheet?
Why does everyone ask me that?"

II. Mental
He stumbled in drunkenly-
I expected a prosthetic leg.
"I partied with some people
here last night. Room 105.
Can I go swimming?
Or is that a stupid question?"
When he came back for more
coffee- the steam wafted
insecurely out th door.
He asked if I lived here.
When I said no, he apologized
for being retarded.

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I met a pirate today. - Mood:Good
Thursday April 17 200811:07:20 PM |
And I'm currently reading "Nine Stories" by JD Salinger. Which inspired me to write this.


I. Physical
I eyed the skull and
crossbones etched on the inside
of his right calf.
When he asked for coffee with
a sideways smile,
he had more gums than teeth.
"Is that underwear on your head?"
"No. It's teh corner of a sheet. why does everyone ask me that?"

II. Mental
He stumbled in as if he had a prosthetic leg.
"I partied with some people here last night,
can I go swimming?
Or is that a stupid question."
He partied with my muse
who wore white stripes
and black boots.
Room 105.
After he was done swimming,
I asked if he lived around here.
"In this motel?"
"Of course not. I must be retarded"

III. Emotional

I met a girl in Palo Alto. I brought her here and she changed. She took of her black stompin' boots and traded them in for a pair of w

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Youthink, Idontthink... - Mood:Good
Thursday April 10 200811:45:21 PM |
i've ever been as tired as I f*cking am right now.

Yesterday I played raquetball for like the first time EVAR and I woke up a little sore from that....and today my cardio kickboxing class decided to focus on upper body. Yay!

I'm already sore. And it's not even tomorrow yet. I'm scared of how Im gonna wake up...

The power went out around town this morning so helllla people were late to class (cause our alarms didn't go off!!!), including myself. My teacher didn't really mind though.

I had lunch with a girl I haven't really talked to in awhile (she has a boyfriend). That was nice. My stalker showed up. surprise surprise.

then i had kickboxing and went home, ate, and then went straight to work.

i don't know why i'm so exhausted though. wtf.

i'm supposed to get beers after work, but a) I'm hella tired and b) i don't know when I'll be getting off..


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Halo-halo! - Mood:Good
Monday April 07 20085:21:14 AM |
We gathered around the table as usual. My father at the head, red, like a picked zit. To his right decayed my Nana, born in Italy either 93 or 94 years ago. She has 2 birth certificates. She floated through a century. To his left an empty chair. My mother’s in the kitchen cleaning up the pansit and lumpia, getting ready to prepare dessert. Jamie, can you help me? Dolly, related to my mother and brother, sits in the next chair. Ashley, 22, in the next. Her dad died 8 years ago to the day. I was in the next chair. Rich Aunt Donna sat to the left. Between Nana and her daughter Donna, Jerry. They had been to the Amazon & Singapore & Africa & Australia. We go there for cultural awareness.
They claim.

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Weight loss suggestions! (did yt just change it``s format?) - Mood:Good
Sunday April 06 20088:51:05 PM |
Bah. I'm eating healthy/well, and working out at least 5 days a week and I'm not getting any real results, minus looking better...

but the scale is saying I'm gaining weight rather than losing. And not just a couple pounds, 5 pounds! I'm scurrred.


the real reason I'm posting is because...

did YT just change it's format? I'm weirded out.

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wanna see something really weird & cool? - Mood:Good
Sunday April 06 20085:03:27 AM |
let's salsa babe!

Yeah, I didn"t realize what I was watching for a's...interesting.

Anyways, I want to learn to salsa.
There's a lot of stuff I want to do, that I *hope* I will get into after I graduate.

I want to learn to salsa.
I want to take more spanish classes.
I want to get my TESL/TEFL and teach abroad for a year.
I want to work at a suicide help line.
I want to road trip the US of A.

Oh gosh, there is SO much I have to experience before I go to grad school! Who knows when I'll go back!?!

Ah, well.

Do we have any salsa dancers here?

Talk to me.

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I`m seriously tired of living right now. - Mood:Good
Saturday April 05 20082:53:24 AM |

A guy I like *probably* doesn't like me.

I missed an egg hunt/HELLA FUN PARTY today because I had to go to school and work.

My whole f*cking life for the next 3 months will revolve around school and work. When I'm not at school, I'm at work. When I'm not at work, I'm at school.

The little time in between is spent at the gym or asleep in my bed.

I have no friends here. I have neighbors who are friends that I to death, but the "friends" that I made started dating each other and sh*t and disappeared into the relationship abyss.

I am currently at work, if you're wondering.

People are weird. I'm PMSING like crazy, every other word makes me cry.

My teacher mentioned something about schizophrenia today and class- and it was so...degrading. I hate the way schizophrenia is perceived in our society. I've probably seen it at some of it's most loathing and violent, and it's still nothing like it's perceived.

I dunno. I guess I'm just...sad...

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I had a really bizarre day. - Mood:Good
Friday April 04 20084:21:11 AM |
I ran into a lot of people...and talked to a lot of's strange.

Started out normally, went to class and the like.
Ran into my friend Zoe walking down a hill, walked & talked with her for a bit.
Ran into Dylan sitting on a log, and had him tell me stories about when he traveled around Guatemala for 7 months.
Ran into Katie in the make-up aisle at Longs, exchanged numbers, gonna hang out.
Accidently called my friend Gaia, and unintentionally made plans to hang out.
Nick was over visiting, got into an argument over whether or not it's worth it trying to achieve knowing everything (even though it's impossible)
Went to work- Steven, a wheel-chair bound neighbor of my work came and talked to me about 40 minutes and brought me a flower.
3 young bums came in offering to work and 45 bucks for room. turned them down.
1 old man bum came in asking for change- drunk as sh*t.
1 old lady bum came in and talked to me for days, used my phone where she had t

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I`m having such a stupid long day! - Mood:Good
Friday April 04 200812:17:34 AM |
Class from 12-2 then kickboxing from 3:30-4:30, then a bus/walk home...

then work from 6-12.

Which is where I am now.

I'm tired. And I have a lot of reading and writing to do, by monday though- thank god it's not tomorrow...

blaaaah. The life of a college student is amazing, but sometimes, it really really sucks.

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Shy boys!! (and shy flirters in general) - Mood:Good
Thursday April 03 20084:50:52 AM |
I need your help in decoding you!! Lol.

There's this guy I really like, and I've liked for awhile. But, the problem is, we are both SUPER shy around each other.

I've hung out with him a couple times in the past year, we went to a poetry slam and random sh*t like that. but it seems to never progress...

sometimes I catch him staring at me, but not every time I see him.

Today I made eye contact with him and he did this weird squinty thing, like he made a face at me while biting his lip.

I don't know wtf that means, lol. I've been doing kinesthetic research and I don't know what to make of it...

anyways, i guess the point of this journal can you usually tell if a shy person likes you??

i really like him, so whenever i'm around him, I bounce really quickly. I don't know why...being in his presence for extended periods of time overwhelms me

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I`m so mother f*cking exhausted... - Mood:Good
Wednesday April 02 20083:09:32 AM |
And I will be for the next 11 tuesdays. LAME!

I went to the dentist in the AM, around nine, and got out just in time to book it to my noon class.

Then I had lunch, and ran into my friend Maria, a transfer student from Sweden. We shot the sh*t, and I then went to the health center and scheduled a gyno and STI exam.

Then I went and ate lunch, and ran into my buddy Miguel. From there I went to my kickboxing class, then home to change/shower.

Went back to school (this time driving, I'm not a fan of night biking from school), and got stoned with my buddy Nick before we had to go watch Titus in class.

I'm taking a Shakespeare and film course this quarter and we have to watch Shakespeare movies on tuesdays. Not so bad, I just wish it wasn't so late!

Got home around ten, made a delish steak meal with rice and bell peppers...

and then laid around, took out the trash, dishes, lame sh*t etc...

highlights of today: on the bus I caught up with a friend of mine, Dylan. He's so rad.<

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American Dad.. - Mood:Good
Monday March 31 20081:36:41 AM |
just insulted my school! I think, lol. It was pretty funny.

"I'd give you an A for effort, but this isn't UC Santa Cruz."

Lol. It's basically making fun of the fact that we didn't even have a grading system. They implanted one within the past 5 years..(stupid school! I'd rather not get grades!) and you could take everything on a pass/fail basis and receive evals.

I love evaluations though- they help me a lot more than any grade can.

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I`m such a lurker... - Mood:Good
Sunday March 30 200811:49:22 PM |
I seriously probably know all the YT drama right now. I've read like 5 super long posts, and then a bunch of the march madness stuff in generals scanning for my name.

Yet, I never really care to partake. Most of it is very amusing.
HA. I'm even quiet whilst on the internet. Go f*cking figure.

I wish I wasn't so awkward.

On a lighter note- I can get on YT at work now! I don't know what happened. I think it's 'cause YT changed so much- it can get behind the server blocker or whatever now.

Yet, now that I'm on the site, I can guarantee it will pretty much get blocked again..because the server hates anyone trying to have even the remotest bit of fun.

Yep. SO I'm sitting at a desk right now, waiting for crazies to attempt to stay at the hotel, then bawk and laugh at me when I tell them the price.

So...entertain me, minions.

...if you don't mind...

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You`ve got to admit it`s getting`s getting better all the time - Mood:Good
Saturday March 29 20087:56:02 PM |
That song is so f*cked up.

Anyways, I've had a really, really interesting 24 hours. Not in any chronological order:

I had sex with this guy I knew i was going to- and now I'm afraid I got herpes. People always lie about that sh*t. So I dunno...

I went to a party and drank/smoked plenty with my friends, and met up with another friend and did a few lines.

I went to the dentist and had a 2 hour appointment from hell. The dentist f*cked up my already f*cked up tooth, and put a fake cap on it which FELL OFF an hour after. He said I can't eat from the front for half an hour, so I waited an hour and had RICE and it fell off. Now I have this ugly stub tooth.

I went to REI today and got a really nice Osprey bag for 100 bucks. It's gonna be my travel pack through Europe. 60 days! I'm excited.

How are your lives getting better?

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MY FUTURE. F*CK. - Mood:Good
Thursday March 27 20087:37:27 PM |
I got straight A's! Well, kinda. I got two A's and an A-. In all upper division courses too! If I continue like this, I'll graduate with a 3.7. That would be nice.

So, I kinda realized that I'm going to graduate in about 9 months. Which means, I have to start looking for JOBS and such. I plan on going to grad school, but not right now. I still don't know what I want to do with my life!

So, I'm thinking of getting that Oxford training, getting my TESL/TOSEL/TEFL whatever and then teaching abroad for a year or 2, then come back and possibly go to grad school for...teaching?


But traveling and teaching would be nice...


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Filipino Easter!! + Good grades! - Mood:Good
Wednesday March 26 20087:47:56 AM |
So far, I got A's in 2/3 of my classes. I'm hella happy about that because I received A's in my two hard classes. I decided to actually apply myself a little and studied quite a bit...and it definitely paid off!

I feel very accomplished about that.

I had a Filipino Easter with my family, we had pansit, lumpia, fried prawns and Halo-halo. Delish! I also brought home some lumpia and fried some up earlier...very tasty. I being asian.

So, tonight I went out with some friends and lit some things on fire/played with fireworks, then drank a bit at their place...

then I joined up with my neighbors and we smoked a bit and went to go hit golf balls off this really hill on a disc golf course called "top of the world." It was really fun! I've never been golfing, let alone at 3 in the morning!

I'm reading "Choke"" right now by Chuck Palahniuk, and I identify with it a lot. That kinda scares me.

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Oh F*CK my cat is cuuuuuttteeeeee - Mood:Good
Saturday March 22 20089:11:47 PM |
I know this is a tad spammish, but I've been meaning to post this thread for awhile.

Please show me pictures of your babies doing weird things!

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Time saturated with ignorance means nothing. - Mood:Good
Saturday March 22 20088:51:57 PM |
I'm becoming obsessed with the concept of time saturation. I'm sure I can come up with something poetic regarding time saturation, but I have yet to really indulge my mind on the concept.

UGH I hate my job. Not really- it's really easy...I'm just the tourists' b*tch. Blah. I had to hunt down an ironing board, an iron, change a light-bulb, direct asians to a couple beaches (which I know they didn't understand), direct a couple people to trader joes, put roll away bed in a room...etc..etc..etc..

I mean, I do this stuff at work all the time, but it's like today people need EVERYTHING. Hopefully it will slow down now though, it's getting to be evening.

I work next to an amusement park, and the ambulance has passed by like 4 times today to go there. Ha! I wonder what people are doing...

it's also right next to the beach though (the boardwalk) so people could also be surfing/drowning/getting attacked by sharks...

All my fantasies lately have revolved around anal sex. Is that we

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I just wasted 20 minutes of my studying time... - Mood:Good
Friday March 21 20084:25:48 PM |
reading the "YTers you hate most" or whatever thread.

I can't believe I wasted that much time on that.
And now I'm wasting time doing this.

I just got out of my Ancient Chinese Literature/History final, and I think I did rather well, tbh. If I don't get an A in that class I'm going to be uber pissed! Because I worked f*cking hard, AND studied my arse off!

I'm gonna say arse now because I don't know if ass is allowed. Muahaha.


UMMM I don't wnat to study for my drugs and society class, but the final is in about 2 hours. BLAH. Cram cram cram cram cram.

I know a lot abotu harm reduction anyways, and I went to most of the lectures and nearly all of the sections.

YAY for being a good uni/college student!

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snorting no-doze... - Mood:Good
Friday March 21 20083:18:40 AM |
f*ck I haven't done this in over a year.

It's hella gross, and my nose hurts . I wish I had something better. I have a paper to write and I'm SUPER tired; I have 2 finals tomorrow (which I've been studying all week for) and a paper due tomorrow.

I haven't even started the paper..blah...and I'm meeting one of my study buddies at 10 in the morning for a cram sesh before one of my finals (noon).

I need to wake the f*ck up! I took a cold shower, didn't work. I jumped around and did some things on my exercise ball, didn't work.

I think I'm just burnt the f*ck out. I had a 4 hour study session with this one girl today before work, then I worked for 6 hours and read/studied there, and I have to write this f*cking paper and study for at least another hour.

Too bad I don't drink coffee. Or anything really caffeinated. I wish I had tea or something...blah.

but now I just have a hurting nose. and I shouldn't be on YT right now. meh.

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