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Female, 85 years old
., ., Western US

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44,711 Posts | Member Since: 12/21/2001
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I`m having such a stupid long day! - Mood:Good
Friday April 04 200812:17:34 AM |
Class from 12-2 then kickboxing from 3:30-4:30, then a bus/walk home...

then work from 6-12.

Which is where I am now.

I'm tired. And I have a lot of reading and writing to do, by monday though- thank god it's not tomorrow...

blaaaah. The life of a college student is amazing, but sometimes, it really really sucks.

There are 16 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Shy boys!! (and shy flirters in general) - Mood:Good
Thursday April 03 20084:50:52 AM |
I need your help in decoding you!! Lol.

There's this guy I really like, and I've liked for awhile. But, the problem is, we are both SUPER shy around each other.

I've hung out with him a couple times in the past year, we went to a poetry slam and random sh*t like that. but it seems to never progress...

sometimes I catch him staring at me, but not every time I see him.

Today I made eye contact with him and he did this weird squinty thing, like he made a face at me while biting his lip.

I don't know wtf that means, lol. I've been doing kinesthetic research and I don't know what to make of it...

anyways, i guess the point of this journal can you usually tell if a shy person likes you??

i really like him, so whenever i'm around him, I bounce really quickly. I don't know why...being in his presence for extended periods of time overwhelms me

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I`m so mother f*cking exhausted... - Mood:Good
Wednesday April 02 20083:09:32 AM |
And I will be for the next 11 tuesdays. LAME!

I went to the dentist in the AM, around nine, and got out just in time to book it to my noon class.

Then I had lunch, and ran into my friend Maria, a transfer student from Sweden. We shot the sh*t, and I then went to the health center and scheduled a gyno and STI exam.

Then I went and ate lunch, and ran into my buddy Miguel. From there I went to my kickboxing class, then home to change/shower.

Went back to school (this time driving, I'm not a fan of night biking from school), and got stoned with my buddy Nick before we had to go watch Titus in class.

I'm taking a Shakespeare and film course this quarter and we have to watch Shakespeare movies on tuesdays. Not so bad, I just wish it wasn't so late!

Got home around ten, made a delish steak meal with rice and bell peppers...

and then laid around, took out the trash, dishes, lame sh*t etc...

highlights of today: on the bus I caught up with a friend of mine, Dylan. He's so rad.<

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American Dad.. - Mood:Good
Monday March 31 20081:36:41 AM |
just insulted my school! I think, lol. It was pretty funny.

"I'd give you an A for effort, but this isn't UC Santa Cruz."

Lol. It's basically making fun of the fact that we didn't even have a grading system. They implanted one within the past 5 years..(stupid school! I'd rather not get grades!) and you could take everything on a pass/fail basis and receive evals.

I love evaluations though- they help me a lot more than any grade can.

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I`m such a lurker... - Mood:Good
Sunday March 30 200811:49:22 PM |
I seriously probably know all the YT drama right now. I've read like 5 super long posts, and then a bunch of the march madness stuff in generals scanning for my name.

Yet, I never really care to partake. Most of it is very amusing.
HA. I'm even quiet whilst on the internet. Go f*cking figure.

I wish I wasn't so awkward.

On a lighter note- I can get on YT at work now! I don't know what happened. I think it's 'cause YT changed so much- it can get behind the server blocker or whatever now.

Yet, now that I'm on the site, I can guarantee it will pretty much get blocked again..because the server hates anyone trying to have even the remotest bit of fun.

Yep. SO I'm sitting at a desk right now, waiting for crazies to attempt to stay at the hotel, then bawk and laugh at me when I tell them the price.

So...entertain me, minions.

...if you don't mind...

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You`ve got to admit it`s getting`s getting better all the time - Mood:Good
Saturday March 29 20087:56:02 PM |
That song is so f*cked up.

Anyways, I've had a really, really interesting 24 hours. Not in any chronological order:

I had sex with this guy I knew i was going to- and now I'm afraid I got herpes. People always lie about that sh*t. So I dunno...

I went to a party and drank/smoked plenty with my friends, and met up with another friend and did a few lines.

I went to the dentist and had a 2 hour appointment from hell. The dentist f*cked up my already f*cked up tooth, and put a fake cap on it which FELL OFF an hour after. He said I can't eat from the front for half an hour, so I waited an hour and had RICE and it fell off. Now I have this ugly stub tooth.

I went to REI today and got a really nice Osprey bag for 100 bucks. It's gonna be my travel pack through Europe. 60 days! I'm excited.

How are your lives getting better?

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MY FUTURE. F*CK. - Mood:Good
Thursday March 27 20087:37:27 PM |
I got straight A's! Well, kinda. I got two A's and an A-. In all upper division courses too! If I continue like this, I'll graduate with a 3.7. That would be nice.

So, I kinda realized that I'm going to graduate in about 9 months. Which means, I have to start looking for JOBS and such. I plan on going to grad school, but not right now. I still don't know what I want to do with my life!

So, I'm thinking of getting that Oxford training, getting my TESL/TOSEL/TEFL whatever and then teaching abroad for a year or 2, then come back and possibly go to grad school for...teaching?


But traveling and teaching would be nice...


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Filipino Easter!! + Good grades! - Mood:Good
Wednesday March 26 20087:47:56 AM |
So far, I got A's in 2/3 of my classes. I'm hella happy about that because I received A's in my two hard classes. I decided to actually apply myself a little and studied quite a bit...and it definitely paid off!

I feel very accomplished about that.

I had a Filipino Easter with my family, we had pansit, lumpia, fried prawns and Halo-halo. Delish! I also brought home some lumpia and fried some up earlier...very tasty. I being asian.

So, tonight I went out with some friends and lit some things on fire/played with fireworks, then drank a bit at their place...

then I joined up with my neighbors and we smoked a bit and went to go hit golf balls off this really hill on a disc golf course called "top of the world." It was really fun! I've never been golfing, let alone at 3 in the morning!

I'm reading "Choke"" right now by Chuck Palahniuk, and I identify with it a lot. That kinda scares me.

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Oh F*CK my cat is cuuuuuttteeeeee - Mood:Good
Saturday March 22 20089:11:47 PM |
I know this is a tad spammish, but I've been meaning to post this thread for awhile.

Please show me pictures of your babies doing weird things!

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Time saturated with ignorance means nothing. - Mood:Good
Saturday March 22 20088:51:57 PM |
I'm becoming obsessed with the concept of time saturation. I'm sure I can come up with something poetic regarding time saturation, but I have yet to really indulge my mind on the concept.

UGH I hate my job. Not really- it's really easy...I'm just the tourists' b*tch. Blah. I had to hunt down an ironing board, an iron, change a light-bulb, direct asians to a couple beaches (which I know they didn't understand), direct a couple people to trader joes, put roll away bed in a room...etc..etc..etc..

I mean, I do this stuff at work all the time, but it's like today people need EVERYTHING. Hopefully it will slow down now though, it's getting to be evening.

I work next to an amusement park, and the ambulance has passed by like 4 times today to go there. Ha! I wonder what people are doing...

it's also right next to the beach though (the boardwalk) so people could also be surfing/drowning/getting attacked by sharks...

All my fantasies lately have revolved around anal sex. Is that we

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I just wasted 20 minutes of my studying time... - Mood:Good
Friday March 21 20084:25:48 PM |
reading the "YTers you hate most" or whatever thread.

I can't believe I wasted that much time on that.
And now I'm wasting time doing this.

I just got out of my Ancient Chinese Literature/History final, and I think I did rather well, tbh. If I don't get an A in that class I'm going to be uber pissed! Because I worked f*cking hard, AND studied my arse off!

I'm gonna say arse now because I don't know if ass is allowed. Muahaha.


UMMM I don't wnat to study for my drugs and society class, but the final is in about 2 hours. BLAH. Cram cram cram cram cram.

I know a lot abotu harm reduction anyways, and I went to most of the lectures and nearly all of the sections.

YAY for being a good uni/college student!

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snorting no-doze... - Mood:Good
Friday March 21 20083:18:40 AM |
f*ck I haven't done this in over a year.

It's hella gross, and my nose hurts . I wish I had something better. I have a paper to write and I'm SUPER tired; I have 2 finals tomorrow (which I've been studying all week for) and a paper due tomorrow.

I haven't even started the paper..blah...and I'm meeting one of my study buddies at 10 in the morning for a cram sesh before one of my finals (noon).

I need to wake the f*ck up! I took a cold shower, didn't work. I jumped around and did some things on my exercise ball, didn't work.

I think I'm just burnt the f*ck out. I had a 4 hour study session with this one girl today before work, then I worked for 6 hours and read/studied there, and I have to write this f*cking paper and study for at least another hour.

Too bad I don't drink coffee. Or anything really caffeinated. I wish I had tea or something...blah.

but now I just have a hurting nose. and I shouldn't be on YT right now. meh.

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pissed of and i need to vent. Plus: do you know this tune? - Mood:Good
Thursday March 20 20082:22:13 AM |
Ok, sooooo

the guy I'm f*cking and I planned to "hang out" tonight, and I told him I"d call him after work. So I did, and he said he'd call me after he was done eating, and he did, but I was in the shower.

So, not even 15 minutes later, I called him back, and he informed me that he thought i was wasn't going to call him back so he made plans with this other girl he's f*cking.

we've talked about the fact that he's f*cking this other girl, and overall I'm OK with it, but don't f*Cking make plans with me and then break them like that. I feel very disrespected and kinda hurt. what a d*ck. Then he proceeded to "reschedule" but I told him I wasn't interested in rescheduling and hung up.


Ok, and the tune goes.

Dun dun dun, (maybe C"s?) du nu nu nu nu nu nu nu

and in notes it would be something like

c d c, e e e e e d c

or something along those lines. Anything?

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Searching for my missing piece... - Mood:Good
Wednesday March 19 20083:41:08 AM |
I've been doing really f*cking well at completing myself on my own (I can sing, I can roll...)

but I do feel like I'm missing something. Not so much something to complete me, but I'm missing a whole bunch of experience.

I know myself pretty damn well, dammit. I know myself better than a lot of people know themselves, (and I know this...)

I dunno.

I just don't know.

And I don't expect you to either.

In other news, I have a really bad sinus/headache thing going on and my back aches. I seriously was *just* sick, so I don't know what this is. I probably picked up something at the gym.


I worked at the radio place today again, that was cool. I like being on air. I also had my regular job too- where I study study studied like the excellent student I am.

if I don't get straight A's this quarter I'm gonna be pi-ssed. 'cause I worked really hard for A's this quarter. Really hard.

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Why do old people always feel like they need to save me? - Mood:Good
Sunday March 16 20087:56:49 PM |
I was making copies at Kinko's the other day, because my teacher is having us turn in all of our notes before the i had to copy about 50 pages worth of notes...

but anyways, I'm stapling a bunch of papers together and I see this really, really old woman across the table kind of hovering about, and i notice her notice me. She walks over to me, (and mind you, this woman looks in her 90's, but she probably was about 85) and looks me straight in the eye and goes

"How are you doing today?"

And I replied that I'm alright...the day had just begun..

and she puts her hand on my shoulder and still looking me intently in the face, "I'm really, really glad to hear that"

and walks away.

OLD PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THIS SH*T TO ME. Though I had this really nice old couple come in to the hotel and ask me a bunch of questions about the area, they were really nice, and I think they got a kick out of me, tbh.

I'm making hemp jewelry at work. I just finished my fir

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To live this life is to love this life - Mood:Good
Saturday March 15 20084:29:38 PM |
I'm getting published in one of my school's literary magazines. I'm so excited about that! I got into the "good" one too, a lot of the faculty have been published in this and I always see it listed as a legit publication.

I mean, granted, my peers/friends *are* the ones publishing it, so I'm sure that helped, but I would like to believe that they didn't show any favoritism

Yesterday was hella fun. I worked for a bit, which was nice (I need the cash!) . Some crazy drunk bum came into my work and started trying to get my boss to give him a room, but she refused, so he sat down and refused to get up. She got frustrated with him and left, and then he started hitting on me.

"You have nice lips"
"You're really nice, I need nice people in my life"
"How am I nice? I haven't even said anything to you!"

and so on and so forth. He told me he needed to sit down because he got hit by a car and his head hurt.

So a coup

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Because we are your friends... - Mood:Good
Tuesday March 11 20084:06:58 AM |
You'll never be alone again.

Well, c'mon...

I'm downloading music. I just finished up D/ling Justice. Anyone have any cool recommendations? I'm basically down for anything. What I"ve downloaded the past 2 days includes:

Marilyn Manson
(more) Daft Punk
Cat Power
The Who
Richie Valens
Radiohead's rainbows
The Slits
The Raincoats
Sam Cooke
Broken Social Scene
Jackie Wilson

Recommend something I probably don't have, but would like...

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Boo for early saturday nights! - Mood:Good
Saturday March 08 20083:43:29 AM |
I got in around But, honestly, the bar was way too crowded for decent conversation, I played a couple games of darts (and won, duh!), and got over it.

So I biked around for a bit and came home.

I probably should study...

but instead I'll watch hilariously ridiculous things.

Like this:


and listen to Bob Dylan be lonely and let his hair hang low.

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I`m stuck in bizarro world - Mood:Good
Wednesday March 05 20087:09:44 AM |
so...the random cute guy I met biking home still hasn't called me . My love life has been lacking major lately-- and I'm starting to get bothered by it.


This guy-I-had-a-crush-on-for-a-super-long-time-but-recently-got-over called me and invited me out to go bowling with him and his friend. SUPER random; we don't even talk or hang out all....

but they didn't have any lanes so we just went back to his place and smoked. His friend left after about an hour or so- and I could've probably stuck around but I chickend out.


So I made an excuse about having to write a paper. I hope he asks me to hang out again.

How can I tell if this is friendship or not? Icould just ask him,...but I'm scurred.

It was too random for me to turn down though,

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a drunken poem - Mood:Good
Saturday March 01 20085:20:22 AM |
walking down sunday street
followiing the path of my shadow
nothing to do but follow my feet

Where blood soaked diamonds admit defeat,
mannequins sit still in the windows,
I'm walking down sunday street

across a path where two dogs meet
and circle about like minnows
old gum and smoked cigarettes fall under my feet

but one in my mouth would be such a treat
smoke circling my head in pillows
while I'm walking down sunday street.
To get to the end would be such a feat
like meditating under sad willows
nothing to do but follow my feet

The end: mind and body greet
eachother wearing reds and yellows,
walking down sunday street
all I had to do was follow my feet.

I need to write while I'm durnk more often perhaps.
I never do it. This will be my playground. yay!

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I just met someone in a really interesting way... - Mood:Good
Friday February 29 20085:20:22 AM |

Tonight I went out and had sushi (which was awesome) and then went to a friends house to have some brewskies...

but anywho- so around midnight I was biking home and this random kid stops me on a corner 'cause his bike broke down. So I tried my best to help him but to no avail.

Anyways, we end up talking alot and hanging out a bit, he was a philosophy major at UC Berkeley but dropped out his last semester due to some sh*t...he's very, very intelligent and cute to boot!

He asked for my number I think I have a date.

I'm excited. There were also some other weird interractions between us through the night. I wonder where this will lead...

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To Pain: - Mood:Good
Wednesday February 27 20084:43:27 PM |
I lost a sharpened, rotting tooth
and a crimson painted fingernail
clawing my way out of
your hollow chest cavity
where i used to sit with
cherry lollipops and listen to my name
echo off your ribcage.

Once I climbed up your throat
and used your tonsils to pull me onto
your tongue where i jealously
felt your teeth with my feet-
I slipped of your tongue and into the sheets
where I smothered you, my lover
with the warm side of
the smelly strawberry shaped pillow.

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I had a rather frightening nightmare.. - Mood:Good
Sunday February 24 20086:15:15 PM |
I came home for the weekend and I'm pretty sure that's what sparked it. Anywho, so it started with me living at home, but my family was different. In my dream, I had two sisters and different parents. Anywho, so I had a neighbor who tried to like rape/harm my sisters and myself in some way. It turns out that my dad and this guy are twins, but my dad had been wearing a face mask my whole life.

So they tried to kill me. So I tried to run away and ran to my neighbors house, (who i haven't seen in years adn who doesn't live there anymore) and they tried to help me but it didn't work, they knew I was there. I think they were chasing me with a hatchet, I don't really remember why I was so scared.

So I decided to catch a bus to Ben Lomond (which is hella far away) and ended up like backpacking for the rest of my life. I was worried about money and school and everything, 'cause I no longer had their support.

I then ended up in an ice cream store with a bunch of other run aways who were

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Some interesting piece of information that I thought I`d share - Mood:Good
Sunday February 24 20081:13:47 AM |
with all ya'll.

Apparently, the same neurotransmitter/hormone or whatever (oxy something) that's released when a woman has a child, is also released when a woman has an orgasm.

This *thing* is responsible for feelings of intimacy and attachment.

Therefore, there is a scientific reason for why girls cannot consistently have sex with an idividual without getting attached on some level.


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I`m bored, so I`ll make you bored - Mood:Good
Tuesday February 19 20089:38:47 PM |
with my boring post on the board.

I went to my 8:30 section this morning, and it ALWAYS ends up making me super tired (I'm NOT a morning person) so, for the past 3 tuesdays, I've missed my 12 o'clock class.

There are only 22 people in there, and I look fairly eccentric, so it"s kinda obvious when I'm missing.

I don't really care though.
Minus the fact that this guy I want to f*ck me is in there.
But I can miss that once a week.

So, the guy that i was f*cking- and who stopped talking to ME (shall i say), hit me up a couple days ago and tried to initiate a get together.
I can't believe he had the audacity to do that.
Guys are so dumb sometimes.
He makes me feel like I'm a whore.

ESPECIALLY after all that drama with him/me/his ex girlfriend last month.


I'm over it.

How are you all?

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