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Female, 29 years old
land locked , ., Western US

  Offline - Last On: 40 mins ago

38 Buddies
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42,827 Posts | Member Since: 12/21/2001
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Interests: Poetry / Music / Cats / Writing / Philosophy
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Birthday:1/19/1986 (29 Years Old)
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24 hours - Mood:Good
Monday January 14 20084:44:37 AM |
hour 1: friend comes over. go out and drink beer and eat burgers. she bought me a butterfly wall decoration for my birthday.

hour 2: friend and I buy Jager. Drink Jager and discuss American politics with neighbor-friends.

hour 3: other friend comes to my house. Much drinking and smoking.

hour 4: another friend comes to my house with 3 of his friends. More drinking and smoking ensues.

hour 5: head to paedophile & pre-teen party. meet f to m transgendered queer.

hour 6: dance thte misfits with 3 people in helmets

hour 7: walk to chevron to purchase forties of sierra nevada and cigarettes

hour 8: walk back to my house and smoke more cigarettes and bud, then walk my friend to her house (about 20 minutes)

hour 9: have friend throw keys at me from second story. lose them because toooo drunk and dark. spend 20 minutes looking for them, and in the process wake up neighbor

hour 10: neighbor smokes us out while we watch his itunes design on his big screen. get the spins.

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i went to a poetry slam (saul williams!) - Mood:Good
Saturday January 12 20086:41:52 PM |
and afterwards I was literally thinking in rhyme.
It was irritating.


Saul williams is coming to slam at my school next month! Some people I know are putting it on, it's pretty f*cking cool! I'm hella excited.

As you put
a part of you inside of me
I push but-
tons that I thought only I knew of
because maybe some part of me
was leaning towards love
and on a ride from a friend's house
to my own home
i can't think of anything
but writing this poem
so I set down my bike
and I sit down and write
about the long fight
between my heart and my hand
I can't understand
why I'm so disrepsected.
I must be infected
cause I was neglected
and feel so rejected
when I think of you
and pushing those buttons
while you do too.
And as I sit on a bed
in a house with a room
that's dark, cold and
smells like a tomb
there is nothing that my hand can do
but grip my bic and write about you
so I choke down my f

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I finished the sonnet - Mood:Good
Thursday January 10 200810:34:13 PM |
and it makes me angry. See my previous journal for some really good sonnets by la_fergola and lucky292 or 929 or whatever the number combination may be.

title: bar spider
His drunken eyes ran back and forth across
the crowded room. He spied a couple young
players leaning on a table. "Eh, boss,
I have a suggestion--" with his tight tongue
he flicked his cigarette and watched the ash
as it fell on his faded jeans. "How 'bout
we play for this here table? Or for cash?"
From his flannel pocket he pulled out
a crumpled twenty, slightly ripped. His stick
was cracked and crooked. The only reason
to wake was drinking beer and playing quick
to get money. Every night this season
he stumbled home and saw, in the mirror,
the chiseled bags under his eyes clearer.

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I have to write a sonnet and it`s going to killlll meeeee - Mood:Good
Thursday January 10 20081:37:21 AM |
God I hate iambic pentameter. I hate it. I hate it. I HATE IT.

I also have to write a story titled ""How the fern got smashed"

This is what I have for my poem
title: One Double Oh Seven

His drunken eyes ran back and forth across
the crowded room. He spied a couple young
players leaning on a table. "Hi boss-
I have a suggestion. Use your lungs"

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what happened to mi llave?! - Mood:Good
Wednesday January 09 20081:07:56 AM |
I feel duped.

I'm trying to get the guy I'm with to come over and bone but I don't have a phone anymore and he's not online.

This isn't working out for me.

I found mi llave.

Somebody needs to talk to me. And not about the new YT set-up.

Perhaps about the fact that my secret santa ripped me off.

Here's an idea, send me a PM! If those yellow bars are still here, and we have this rad new set up, I'm gonna be pissed.

1, 2, 3 GO!

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so who was uggle? - Mood:Good
Monday January 07 20087:50:03 AM |
this will NOT be a bashing thread. No uggle bashing in this thread, please. If you would like to bash, create your own thread and bash there.


I want to know if I was right.
Did she state her *true* identity on new years or what?

I'm outside the loop.

There are 60 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Dry ice. Dry eyes. Dry Ice. Dry eyyyeeeessss. - Mood:Good
Saturday January 05 20085:04:17 AM |
Keep it low.


I'm still ill. There was a crazy storm here earlier! It knocked down two trees next to my house, and our power was out for about 3 hours. Luckily I slept for most of those three hours.

My friends got a really good picture of me passed out on their couch. When they post it on facebook I'll grab it and show ya'll. It's a classic sleeping photo.

I haven't checked my e-mail in awhile.
I think I'll do that whilst I roll this Jay.

How are things going on your side of the world? Stormin much?

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I`m super sickly. - Mood:Good
Friday January 04 20085:52:24 AM |
So, I have the icky flu. I couldn't sleep well last night, I was sore and tossing and turning and waaaay too hot. I think the person in the bed with me is going to catch it too, poor him! I have fever, cough, congestion, head ache and ear infection. Ew!

My cat is licking my ice cream.
I'm sooo sick I was sucking on wasabi peas and my sinus' didn't even clear up! I can eat them by the handful!

I kinda did a lot today, but nothing productive. After the guy got up and went to work, I got ready for a long day of hanging out with my neighbors. I went over, smoked, slept a little more (feeling ill) and then went to campus to buy my books for next quarter.

Then my roommate came and dropped off a futon, and got REALLY pissed about this lame sweater situation.
Then I went and hung out with some friends that just got back into town, they had a keg but I feel too ill to even drink.

Then I came back home and smoked a couple bowls with a guy on E & a guy who just got a restrainin

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Take anything you want!! - Mood:Good
Thursday January 03 20084:24:16 PM |
OMG, watch this. it's one of the funniest things I've seen in a long while:

spare me my life

But other than that, I had an amazing new years!! The mars volta set was f*cking beautiful! My friends and I dressed as Bob Dylan, Janis Joplin and John Belushi.

The acoustic set they did first die for. They opened with Televators and played Miranda(..), I almost nutted myself. At midnight they had a countdown and hella balloons fell all over the place...

They played 'til about 2:30 am, and then a DJ was supposed to go on (I wanted them to 'cuase my friend and I were rolling balls) but they didn't because everyone left.

Go figure, it WAS a mars volta concert.

I "hung out" with "the guy" last night, and we got along really well. I love playing with him. I like to play, haha. That sounds so cheesy, but I'm a very playful person, and he's not at ALLLL

'so I just pick on him til he

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Stiffed by secret santa! - Mood:Good
Sunday December 30 200711:36:48 PM |
I think we should out them. What's the plan?
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Oh my god. O MY GOD! TOMORROW - Mood:Good
Sunday December 30 20077:06:34 PM |
Is going to be one of the best experiences of my life.

I'm going to a Mars Volta BASH! Here are the set times:

8:00pm - Nobody (

8:30pm - Volta acoustic set
9:00pm - The Eternals (

10:30pm - Peanut Butter Wolf Video Performance (

11:30pm - The Mars Volta Electric Set

2:00am - DJ Dennis (

3:00am - Peanut Butter Wolf DJ Set

And I'm planning on dropping E, at least a half pill. A little bit of alky...

this is going to be one helluva party!

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angels often forget how to walk on the moon - Mood:Good
Sunday December 30 20075:48:21 AM |
I drove to where he had lived
every third full moon. This year
it was around Christmas. I listened
to the CD he bought me
on our second Christmas.
I listened to my heart beat in rhythm
to the rotating wheels of my car
turning, turning, leading me to
where he had lived.
The Christmas before last
I remembered how we sat on a mutual friends'
front steps, talking about growing up,
laying on our shadows while the moon
light allowed me to really look at his shoes
and it was that night he told me he wanted to shoot
himself in the head.
When I reached his house
the CD ended and I turned the wheel
turned around and came back
because it was then I realized
that he never would.
I turned around and followed the
moonlight home, leading me to a place
that he always looked for
knowing that he was the one
and not the moon
sending me home this time
ending this endless drive
to his house and back,
every third full
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Ham & Cheese Croissant! - Mood:Good
Saturday December 29 200712:08:59 PM |
YUM. I live across the street from this amazing breakfast place, and I just purchased myself a ham & cheese stuffed croissant (which I am warming right now, I them warm) and a fresh squeezed orange juice (of which I already downed...)

I rarely eat breakfast, more so because I am never awake to enjoy a delicious one!

My neighbor has work at 10, and I have a truck.

Therefor, we made a trip to the dumps at 7:30. WAAAAY to early for my tastes, but at least I get to enjoy breakfast.

After I heat this thing up and down it, I have two options.

a) Take a shower and clean house (which hasn't been done in awhile and needs to be done)


b) go back to sleep.

At this point, I am definitely in favor of the latter since I only got about 4 hours of sleep last night.


I do really need to clean house, and honestly, what else do I have to do today that I need to be refreshed for?

Nothing. Work.

But overall, I think sleeping won.

HOw are all you this fine morning?

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Ungh. - Mood:Good
Saturday December 29 20073:58:47 AM |
I'm hooking up with the guy again.
I can't seem to let go of a booty call when I have it.

But apparently, this is what the single life of twenty-something year olds consists of.

My cat is lying at my back, he's so warm and fuzzy.
I've been very inspired to write lately, just haven't really taken the intiative. I want to write something about driving up to visit a friend in the city & listening to a CD they had bought me, but once I get there the CD ends and i just turn around and drive home while the moon lights my wya.

I just don't know where the twist will sit in. Oh well. I think of something.

For x-mas I receieved: $12,000 from my nana for school, $1,500 from my parents for a CC bill, a random assortment of foods & toilet paper, led zeppelin 3, a pinback album, a wallet, the new smashing pumpkins album, a mp3 player, a beatles and philosophy book, a bunch of lotions, a shel siverstein book..and I think that's it.

I really appreciate everything i receieved,

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EuRoTrIp! - Mood:Good
Thursday December 27 20076:55:00 PM |
So, this summer, my friend and I are doing the backpack through europe thing.

We are landing in dublin, staying there for a few days, catching a ferry to luxemborg, then going to see stonehenge and then staying with her fam in london.

After that we'll hop over to france (paris, staying with fam), I want to go to Louvre and see Jim Morrison's grave..then we're going to germany (berlin) and also finding a concentration camp to visit..

Then we're going to Budapesht for a couple days and see the dead baby tower, then down to Italy for a week(sistine chapel, vatican city), then we'll catch a boat to greece and remain for a week in greece.

After that, I'm catching a plane to the Philippines to visit my brother and baby nephew who I haven't seen yet.


The reason I'm posting this is because I've never been to Europe, and wondering if people have any recommendations?

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It`s so damn cold. - Mood:Good
Saturday December 22 20074:56:59 AM |
Yahoo weather states that's it's "35 degrees but feels like 30"

F*cking beautiful ocean, making it feel all colder and shiznit.

Today wasn't nearly as interesting as yesterday. I woke up. Did some dishes. Talked to my cat, the usual.

My roomie has been out of town for about a week, and I realized the longer amount of time I'm left alone, the more prone I am to talk to myself. I was basically having a conversation with myself in the shower, it was so weird.

I went to the bar with a friend I haven't seen in awhile, caught up with him, his g/f, and his gf's dad...haha. It was random, but he travels alot and filled us in with all his interesting stories. He focused mainly on berlin & croatia.

On my way there, on of their friends biked up behind me and I was like oh blah blha I'm going to go see these people, so he tagged along for a bit. It was cool, we biked together...I rarely bike with other people. It's fun

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Today is my 6 year YT anniversary... - Mood:Good
Friday December 21 20075:41:51 PM |
damn. I think I've averaged about 2,200 posts a year.


I need a life.

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My life is simply complex - Mood:Good
Friday December 21 20074:30:11 PM |
Ha, not really. But it is.

Anyway, yesterday was really interesting. I had my training for the soundboard at the radiostation I'm volunteering at, and it was only supposed to be from 10-12. I ended up not leaving til like 2:15 because the trainer and I ended up having a 2 hour philosophical conversation, mostly revolving around the movie "The Secret" which I haven't seen, but I think my personal beliefs reolve around those beliefs.

We also talked about how the social and economic infrastuctures keep people in the mental cycle of not changing (perhaps) because "the secret" is a very ameri-centric concept...or is it?

Well, after that I came home and made lunch, teriyaki steak stir fry! Yum.

Then I went to work, where this spiritual healer named Illumina from Barson Bay (australia) became obsessed with me. well, not obsessed..but she was really interested in was kinda weird. We talked.

My bosses also gave me 50 dollars as a gift for christmas.

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I got my grades. - Mood:Good
Wednesday December 19 20075:44:30 AM |
I got:

Creative writing (major course): A
Asian Lit: B
Modern Lit: Pass (but I would've gotten a B+ if I took it for a grade)
Yoga: Pass

I'm kinda pissed. I did a lot more work in my Asian American Lit. class, and I received a B. I think it's because I turned in a lot of things late...

and I didn't turn 2 at all. Haha, Ok, so I guess I deserve it, but I rocked ass on my final paper and on my presentation.

Boo, oh well. I got an A in my creative writing class, f*cking finally. All my other creative writing classes I've gotten A-'s. I think it's because my writing has strengthened a lot in the past 6 months.

I'll do better next quarter, I know it. And I won't waste a class I'm gonna pass on pass/no pass.

I just thought I would've gotten a C in that class, because it was soooo hard.

BUt, since everyone was doing bad he kinda curved it, and if you attended this opera (madama butterfly) he would bump you up a WHOLE grade level.

Which would've given me a B+.


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i want a boyfriend so he can buy me really nice christmas gifts :-( - Mood:Good
Tuesday December 18 20077:59:42 PM |
that i'd like.

Haha, I know that sounds terribly commercial, and I don't mean it in that sense but...

I was just hanging out with my friend and we went christmas shopping, she bought him an espresso machine and he bought her 2 tickets to see the nutcracker in san francisco.

I want someone to buy me nice things I've never had a lover around a holiday...and my parents buy me nice things but not like, things i really want...if that makes sense.


I'll wait til next year.

Knowing me, I'll probably end up marrying a jew.

*le sigh*

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So far I`ve passed yoga and my opera course... - Mood:Good
Tuesday December 18 20076:46:12 AM |
which was hard as f*ck.

Which is why I took it pass/fail aka credit/no credit AND
I got credit.

Not for yoga; my opera class. I struggled so much trying to keep up with the general content of the course; it was rather irritating.

I'm also surprised I passed yoga, I didn't go for the last month. Meh, as long as I don't have a no pass on my transcript it's alllll gooood.

I don't know what I got for my other 2 classes though. I expect NO LESS than an A or A- in my creative writing class, and I expect no less than a B in my Asian American literature class.
Actually, I think I'm going to get either two A-'s, or a B+ and an A-.

That sounds about right.

Yay! School has been working out AOK for me so far. As of yet, my transcript for upper-div work reads:
C (stupid f*cking fem studies course that ended up being about quantum theory )

another A, B, P, P will definitely strengthen my GPA.

oh, school.

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I keeep on sneezing. - Mood:Good
Monday December 17 20074:18:52 PM |
But I'm not sick, hell no, I just got OVER being sick a couple weeks ago

But I haven't been working out and not eating my veggies, so I'm sure my immune system is dropping.

I think I'm getting depressed again. My sleeping schedule is all out of whack, I'll get up at like 8, be hella awake, take a shower etc...then crawl back into bed and sleep until noon.

Or until one of my friends call me.

Whatever, I always get depressed this time of year.

I have a lot of stuff to do today, I think...

I'm going to call my friend Matt. i was supposed to call him last week but I was too busy procrastinating to ever do anythiing.
I have to wait for training on the sound board as an engineer..
I might have to go to work.
I have to During finals my roommate and I totally shat out on cleaning.

I need to go grocery shopping...I think I'll do that after I finish this bowl.

BUt I hate grocery shopping stoned.


It might be late

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I hate my job. - Mood:Good
Sunday December 16 200711:28:23 PM |
So I just had to kick a bum out of the hotel.
They tricked the system and basically didn't pay for their room.
Well, they did, through her dad's CC, but it's like 2000 dollars
and we don't do monthly rentals...

and she was asking me about breakfast...

she said she just wanted to get out of the cold...

I feel bad...

so so bad...

but it's my job...

stupid empath...

stupid eros...

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I`m tired of bending backwards - Mood:Good
Saturday December 15 20075:11:34 AM |
walking over white notes with my hands and black notes with my feet while dancing in quarter-note rainfalls...

It's too loud to stand.

C major brightened my day but b minor told me to hide when the moon came out to cry. She would sing, she would sing for the ring of the bell in her heart that won't start to sing.

It's too quiet to breathe.

BLAAAAAH. I still have writer's block. I wrote that right now...I'm trying to see where forced spontenaity gets me.

I'm also kinda drunk, and my jewish friend and I made "special" latkes! It's great. I wnat more burrr actually.

what am I listening to..yardbirds blues type sh*t. It's pretty rad.

Can't the cat walk on the windowsill?
I don't know. The tail is broken, it flips awkwardly
as the cat waddles like a duck
instead of prowling like a lion

ok that erally sucks. HELP ME.

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Friday December 14 20074:49:23 AM |
Anyone care to revise an essay on the opera Moses and Aron for me??? I'll pay you in virtual sexual favors.

Not really. But you can pretend I am.

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