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Male, 264 years old
Western US

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40 Buddies
62 Subscribers
19,221 Profile Views
68,245 Posts | Member Since: 5/19/2009
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Interests: Nudism / Drinking / Nudism / Drinking / Nudism
Homepage: (None)
Birthday:4/7/1753 (264 Years Old)
IM Type: (Decline to State) IM Name:
Occupation: cleaning bird sh*t out of cuckoo clocks
Marital Status: (Decline to State)
Sexual Preference: Straight
Religion: Agnostic
Politics: (Decline to State)
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Active Journal Entries | Archived Journal Entries

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Predictive text lulz. - Mood:Spastic
Monday August 07 20172:24:06 PM |
It still amuses me how the phone learns the kinds of sh*t I typically say.

Some funny ones I've noticed in the past week:

I type "he's" and it wants to follow with "about worthless".

I type "I'm" and it wants to follow with "still f*cking here".

Share yours. Play the predictive text middle button game if you want.

There are 44 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Post in here and I`ll post a picture for you... - Mood:Good
Monday June 05 201710:26:35 PM |
...that I have saved on my computer or on google drive.

The picture may or may not have meaning.

There are 141 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Do you think I`m weird? - Mood:Confused
Tuesday May 30 20172:52:31 PM |
No, man, seriously -


I've always had this thing where I'm actually responsible and do what I'm supposed to do, when it's supposed to be done.

The longer I spend in my career, the more I notice how unusual this is. I don't work with derelicts, either. Many of my co-workers are licensed engineers with graduate degrees.

Too much bullsh*tting, procrastinating, forgetting stuff, taking forever to take action or reply to clients, etc.

But this really is a great company. It's very successful.

I just can't decide if most people are sh*tty employees in general, or if I'm some kind of hyper-workaholic.

Even back in elementary school when other kids were f*cking off and playing I was getting my homework done . Only after that would I go play.

So...no, man, seriously - am I weird?

There are 121 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

F*ckin` interns, man. - Mood:Disgusted
Monday May 15 20175:02:35 PM |


They hire so many of these f*ckers. Like 5 new ones showed up today. I was praying that I wouldn't get one assigned to me because then I'd have to keep them busy, teach them sh*t, and fix all their f*ckups.

In essence, it would just be something else to slow me down.

Well, I didn't exactly get one, but my boss got one, which basically means I got one. FML.

There are 83 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

See my heart I decorate it like a grave - Mood:Confused
Monday April 24 201711:02:43 AM |
So I had this dream that they made me a mod (without even asking).

I got a PM from bird containing the "new mod welcome package" with modbot's password. It was something completely stupid like "bosh" or "cosh" or some sh*t.

There are 59 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I know this chick she lives down on melrose - Mood:Bored
Friday February 17 201711:49:20 AM |
Where are all of you fxcking cxnts?
There are 71 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

k, who`s good at photoshop - Mood:Mischievous
Monday January 30 20174:11:11 PM |
I would like highcat's face inserted over the cat's face in this pic:


There are 61 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

So I hear that Scarlett Johansson is single again - Mood:Confused
Wednesday January 25 20177:59:44 PM |
Skyfish is disappointed in the number of journals, so I thought I would add some content.

I swear I saw this guy today whose idea of a properly restrained car seat was holding the f*cking thing with one hand and steering with the other. And this was on a busy city freeway.

There are 26 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Poor bastard. Never knew how close he`d come to getting fired. - Mood:Good
Friday November 18 20162:37:41 PM |

"Forget about tonight."



Even if I told him he never would've believed me.

This is in reference to my co-worker. I like the guy on a personal level, but work-wise he's a train wreck. He's always dropping the ball on deadlines and goes days without showing up and no one even knows where he is. We're pretty laid back in regards to hours in the office, but this guy takes it to another level.

Yesterday some client called because he was left hanging for like a week. My boss was like, "yeah...I think he's done".

I think what saved his ass today is that he showed up. That doesn't change the fact that he's a f*ckup, though.

There are 79 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

DEBATE SH*TPOSTING THREAD - Mood:Embarrassed
Monday September 26 20169:03:45 PM |
It's starting. Feel free to post anything here.

There are 302 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I love having interns - Mood:Happy
Monday August 22 201612:20:30 PM |
Seriously. Throughout my life I've so rarely had pee-ons I could pass menial tasks to.

Here, kid:
copy this
carry this
fix this

Muahaha!

There are 38 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Are you superstitious? - Mood:Surprised
Tuesday July 12 201612:50:21 PM |
On one of my recent flights my seat was in row 14. I walked down the aisle, counting the rows...10, 11, 12....14.

There was no 13. I've flown a lot, but have never noticed this before, probably because I'd have to be seated in row 14 to actually notice it.

But f*cking seriously, no row 13? THAT many people are ridiculous enough about unlucky numbers for a plane to be labeled this way?


Do you have any superstitions? I promise I won't make fun of you.

There are 87 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I`m on a plane. I can`t complain. - Mood:Good
Monday July 11 201610:19:03 PM |
At this moment CuckingFunt is 32,000 feet in the air.

I paid five bucks for Internet access, so f*cking entertain me.

There are 37 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

goad me on - Mood:Spastic
Friday June 24 201611:35:09 PM |
I'm thinking of shaving my head. I've done it many times before, usually in the summer because it feels really good. Right now I just have regular short hair.

The thing is, I'm one of those lucky guys who isn't balding in the least. My hair has looked the same my entire adult life.

+ it's extremely comfortable
+ easy to maintain
+ I can wear a hat if I think I look dumb

- I look younger with hair
- I look handsomer with hair
- I feel like I "should" have hair ... because I have hair

There are 82 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

This might be controversial, but f*ck it - Mood:Confused
Thursday May 12 201610:14:27 PM |
So today after work I stopped to get gas. I went inside to get something to drink. I was waiting to pay and there was this guy in front of me pre-paying for $30 worth of gas, and...

...he literally did not know how to count.

I kept listening to the exchange between him and the cashier, and I just couldn't believe what was happening. I'd see him hand the cashier some money, and then the cashier would be like, "you said 30, right? okay, I need 5 more" and he'd hand her some more money and she'd go, "okay, now 3 more". This continued for a while.

The thing is, this guy DROVE. I saw him pull up. Are mentally retarded people actually allowed to drive? If someone was driving him around, I wouldn't have thought anything of it, but this was kind of scary.

There are 60 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Who would you look like if you`d been born the opposite sex? - Mood:Good
Monday March 21 20166:21:47 PM |

There are 56 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

Poor personal hygiene: I don`t get it. - Mood:Confused
Wednesday February 03 201612:54:09 PM |
I've had to share an office with this guy, and the thing is...he kind of stinks. He's usually not in the office much, so it's not a big deal. His hair is greasy and he dresses like a slob.

There's one other guy who looks homeless. He has a scraggly beard, never washes his clothes, and barely has any teeth.

I actually like these guys. They're both nice to talk to and intelligent. I just DON'T GET THIS. I mean, wtf?

There are 164 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

I found bgraham`s band - Mood:Good
Friday January 29 20162:00:18 PM |
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e4Ao-iNPPUc
There are 9 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOLLSASAUR! - Mood:Good
Saturday January 23 20169:02:33 PM |
A little birdie told me that you're 21 today!
There are 5 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

BAPPY HIRTHDAY, MILD_WONKEYS!! - Mood:Good
Tuesday January 12 201612:12:28 AM |

There are 7 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

BAPPY HIRTHDAY, LETTYPRUCKYG!! - Mood:Good
Sunday January 03 20165:57:38 PM |
HAVE A HIP-POPPIN GOOD DAY!
There are 10 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

CuckingFunt`s New Year`s Rockin` Eve - Mood:Bored
Thursday December 31 201511:30:11 AM |
Feel free to post anything in here - random thoughts, discussions, opinions, observations, etc. Anything goes.

Today's a pretty boring day at work. There's not much going on and my boss isn't here. I'll probably excuse myself early.

There are 97 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

uhhh guys... - Mood:Confused
Wednesday September 23 201512:26:02 PM |
I just received a buddy invite...from no one. Under "from" it's blank and when I open it up nothing is there.
There are 74 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

BAPPY HIRTHDAY, GBRAHAM AND LONDERWAND!!!!! - Mood:Good
Wednesday September 23 20152:27:00 AM |

There are 14 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FATTY! - Mood:Good
Monday September 14 20156:59:13 PM |
YAY 21!!
There are 23 comments on this journal entry. View/Add Comments

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