I think back to me at freshmen year. A 19 year old kid who thought he knew everything and thought it’d be forever until he graduated and so that he... Who's Online | Find Members | Private Messages
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From the Journal of CRA-Z_HEART | mood: Good

It’s been three years as of today since I graduated college, and I’m feeling reminiscent.

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24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 6:55:56 PM EST (GMT-5)
I think back to me at freshmen year. A 19 year old kid who thought he knew everything and thought it’d be forever until he graduated and so that he had all the time in the world to figure his sh8t out.
Boy was he wrong.

Fast forward 7 years, one dead mom, five different jobs, a new cat, and a new car later.
Honestly these last three years have gone by faster than my first three years of college did, that’s for sure.

A month after I graduated I entered into what was probably the worst year of my life, which was funny because until that year, the year prior was the worst. Due to the whole mom dying thing and all.
But getting constantly screwed by pooty roommates and getting taking advantage of and ignored at every corner, driving a sh8tty cat with no heat to get to a job where I was underpaid.

I didn’t really think I’d live to see to today, to be honest.
Dante really saved my life.

24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 6:57:46 PM EST (GMT-5)
I wish I could find all the people who all the poo I’ve gone through made me be such a sh8tty person to.
It doesn’t excuse some of the sh8t I’ve said and done, I just wish I could apologize to them all and let them know I’m trying to be better.

I didn’t really know the point of this journal when I started it. This is basically free verse at this point.

I wish my mom could see that I’m turning it around.
24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 6:59:54 PM EST (GMT-5)
Jesus Christ I really shouldn’t be listening to my Spotify daily mix that features all the saddest sh8t I listen to
24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 7:58:38 PM EST (GMT-5)
Hey, I'm proud of you for persevering and making it to a point of stability. It's rough for any recent graduate, let alone someone dealing with depression, tragedy, etc.

I hope you give yourself a big pat on the back because you deserve it.
24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 7:59:48 PM EST (GMT-5)
(And give Dante a big pet on the back because he's a great cat)
24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 8:42:46 PM EST (GMT-5)
Glad to hear that things have turned around for you.
24 days ago - Wednesday 5/1/19 - 11:57:18 PM EST (GMT-5)
I’ve given Dante so many pets lately
24 days ago - Thursday 5/2/19 - 1:00:24 AM EST (GMT-5)
Hey craz I bet you think would’ve be so slow if your journals didn’t suck so hard
24 days ago - Thursday 5/2/19 - 7:16:45 AM EST (GMT-5)
You're no Amaq...
23 days ago - Thursday 5/2/19 - 6:05:49 PM EST (GMT-5)
Goddammit I can’t even spell wouldn’t right
23 days ago - Thursday 5/2/19 - 6:08:37 PM EST (GMT-5)
On Thursday 5/2/19 - 1:00:24 AM CRA-Z_HEART wrote:
Hey craz I bet you think would’ve be so slow if your journals didn’t suck so hard


Nah.

This journal is so so real. Despte the sh*t you've been through its really good to see you reminiscing from the other side of a lot of it.

This spring is my 3 years out of law school, 2 years since I've been out of school completely (mostly), and also 2 years of living at home with my parents and family.

A lot of the parts of my life are really good.
If I stop too long and think about the parts that aren't good I think I might shatter in a million pieces.

One day at a time, Craz.



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