it smells like vanilla and cigarettes im a drug addict my friends are all drug addicts and bad people the woman im in love with is an abusive piece of... Who's Online | Find Members | Private Messages
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From the Journal of cola | mood: Good

im trying not to cry in this bar

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11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 1:30:19 AM EST (GMT-5)
it smells like vanilla and cigarettes


im a drug addict

my friends are all drug addicts and bad people

the woman im in love with is an abusive piece of sh-t who is engaged to a f-cking army dude

my best friend got outted as a rapist and i dont know what to do. i want to hate him. i want to tell him hes a horrible human being and i never want to see him again. right now hes currently arguing with my other best friend and im sitting by them and i dont know what to do.

i hate everything im tired of watching everyone i love be horrible people. but they all are. i wanna take everything back. i wanna go home but i didnt drive here. i wanna cry and i wanna never talk to these people again. but i cant have a break down right now. i cant afford that right now


i havent had a mental breakdown in months. but its probably gonna halpen in the next hour

11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 1:31:24 AM EST (GMT-5)
yep im shaking and my jaw keeps clenching its definitely gonna happen



i cant control how much in dhaking yep here it come


bye
11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 1:33:18 AM EST (GMT-5)
god speed brother
11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 4:08:21 AM EST (GMT-5)
11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 9:15:06 AM EST (GMT-5)
It's never too late to start making changes. You're lucky, you're young and full of options (even if it doesn't feel like it).

How are you feeling today?
11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 9:35:27 AM EST (GMT-5)
I felt this thread.
11 days ago - Wednesday 11/28/18 - 1:03:53 PM EST (GMT-5)
Go to NA.
9 days ago - Thursday 11/29/18 - 8:30:38 PM EST (GMT-5)
ended up crying in the bar

doing better now

taking a break from some stuff for a minute while i figure stuff out

including here. talk soon
9 days ago - Thursday 11/29/18 - 8:35:41 PM EST (GMT-5)
Good luck kiddo. Some introspection and a fresh start will do ya good.
9 days ago - Thursday 11/29/18 - 8:48:38 PM EST (GMT-5)
Good luck, son.
9 days ago - Thursday 11/29/18 - 10:33:48 PM EST (GMT-5)
You'll be okay, little man. It's never too late to cut people off and make new friends. If people are being toxic, you have absolutely no obligation to keep them in your life. You don't owe anyone sh-t.
You don't owe anyone your friendship if they don't deserve it.

This is your life, in the end, you're the only one who has to live with yourself. In the end, it's your happiness and well-being that matters because without it, you 'll struggle to give anything to those who deserve it.

It may not feel like it, but you have the world at your fingertips. You can always change things.
9 days ago - Thursday 11/29/18 - 10:47:38 PM EST (GMT-5)
you're young and 100% capable of getting off drugs and past this part of your life so just go ahead and take the first step to do that.
2 days ago - Thursday 12/6/18 - 8:39:55 PM EST (GMT-5)
im back.

took a prozac with a shot of rum this morning

healthy !



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