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Happiness is...

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4 months ago - Saturday 7/8/17 - 5:03:45 PM EST (GMT-5)
Cheap, delicious pizza
4 months ago - Saturday 7/8/17 - 5:15:35 PM EST (GMT-5)
when you do something nice for someone and you can tell they appreciate it
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 9:51:50 AM EST (GMT-5)
Nutting in a ho
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 9:54:27 AM EST (GMT-5)
you gonna make babies uber?
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 10:01:14 AM EST (GMT-5)
I feel like uber wishes he had a baby. He'd probably make a good dad.

I doubt he'd want to deal with some bitch baby-momma tho so I don't see it happening any time soon
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 10:04:20 AM EST (GMT-5)
Happiness is taking pride in creating something good good.
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 10:14:18 AM EST (GMT-5)
I don't think I want kids. Not unless I found the perfect woman for me.
4 months ago - Sunday 7/9/17 - 10:20:24 AM EST (GMT-5)
when you're done with all of your responsibilities for the time being and no one wants nothing from you
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 2:11:23 AM EST (GMT-5)
On Sunday 7/9/17 - 10:20:24 AM skyfish wrote:
when you're done with all of your responsibilities for the time being and no one wants nothing from you

this is a thing??!
You can be DONE with responsibilities.
I want this
This is my goal
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 2:45:12 PM EST (GMT-5)
Going the f*ck home early because you're boss is on the other side of the country.
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 2:45:52 PM EST (GMT-5)
man when my boss is away it specifically means i can't go home early because i have to cover her
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 2:49:42 PM EST (GMT-5)
Sometimes I come in pretty early and I get stuck staying later than I normally would. This is because he likes throwing sh*t my way at 4:30 - 5:00.

If he's not here I don't feel like I have to stick around for that.
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 10:05:51 PM EST (GMT-5)
On Friday 7/21/17 - 2:45:12 PM CuckingFunt wrote:
Going the f*ck home early because you're boss is on the other side of the country.

*your

I'm ashamed of you, cuck.
4 months ago - Friday 7/21/17 - 10:11:44 PM EST (GMT-5)
I'm tired, god damn it!
4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 2:11:37 AM EST (GMT-5)
On Sunday 7/9/17 - 9:51:50 AM UberRoxor wrote:
Nutting in a ho

I laughed so hard I nearly died
4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 2:33:40 AM EST (GMT-5)
an 85yr old bloke shot at his ho yesterday...

apparently he got obsessed by a hooker at a brothel and stalked her and did a drive by shooting...then when the cops chased him he crashed his car and shot himself..they think accidentally..

4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 2:42:29 AM EST (GMT-5)
Happiness is my stoner coloring book
And just coloring in general
4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 3:03:06 AM EST (GMT-5)
Happiness is knowing Snoop Dogg owns a doormat that says, "Home Honey, I'm High."
4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 3:37:29 AM EST (GMT-5)
Two hours in a swimming pool, apparently.
4 months ago - Saturday 7/22/17 - 8:17:22 AM EST (GMT-5)
... overrated.
3 months ago - Sunday 7/23/17 - 9:55:47 PM EST (GMT-5)
On Sunday 6/4/17 - 1:01:15 PM luckystar107 wrote:
No alarm clocks

this is my favorite part about not working mornings. I only set an alarm if I have a doctor's appointment or something
I wake up and go to bed whenever I want
3 months ago - Thursday 7/27/17 - 5:34:52 PM EST (GMT-5)
being appreciated!!
3 months ago - Saturday 7/29/17 - 8:52:24 AM EST (GMT-5)
This is kind of weird, but:

I made a copy of my CPR certification card to my boss and left it for him. I thought he'd throw it in a file drawer or something.

you know how doctors have their diplomas and certifications in fancy frames on the office walls? Well, he carefully cut out my certification to fit in a picture frame along with his.

I don't know why that was so touching but it made me feel nice.
3 months ago - Saturday 7/29/17 - 9:00:08 AM EST (GMT-5)
On Sunday 6/4/17 - 1:47:32 AM Rag_Doll_ wrote:
I keep staring at my bathroom closet every time I go in there ever since I cleaned it up last weekend.


Aha I do That

Thinking about my upcoming trips to Amsterdam and Edinburgh makes me happy
3 months ago - Saturday 7/29/17 - 9:02:43 AM EST (GMT-5)
On Saturday 7/29/17 - 8:52:24 AM mousepelled wrote:
This is kind of weird, but: I made a copy of my CPR certification card to my boss and left it for him. I thought he'd throw it in a file drawer or something. you know how doctors have their diplomas and certifications in fancy frames on the office walls? Well, he carefully cut out my certification to fit in a picture frame along with his. I don't know why that was so touching but it made me feel nice.

i love your boss

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